Apex Predator - Chap 17
Qu Moyu picked Shen Dai up from his feet and made him sit on his lap.
He studied the tears that were spilling out endlessly from the corners of his eyes. Brushing them away with a fingertip, he remarked, “You don’t usually seem like such a crybaby.”
Shen Dai stared at him, vacant and sluggish, uncertain for a moment if this scene of him being held by Qu Moyu wasn’t just pure fantasy conjured up out of sheer discomfort.
Qu Moyu’s hand stroked his dampened hair before sliding down to the back of his neck. The wide hand held his entire nape comfortably in one grasp. The warmest part of the palm was pressed against his feverishly hot gland – separated only by a now-superfluous pheromone-blocking patch.
Qu Moyu’s breathing became laboured.
Surrounded by that dry and cold ebony wood pheromone, an electric current shot through Shen Dai’s scalp. His body was trembling lightly, in a way that was becoming increasingly unbearable.
The hand on his nape had him completely subjugated, but at the same time, it gave him a sense of refuge, as if he were being guarded by the king of beasts.
Animalistic sexual instinct dominated the brain during heat. All rationality and perception clamoured to him that – regardless of anything – he needed to mate with this person.
The last thread of his reason snapped. He held on to Qu Moyu’s neck tightly, pressing his searing lips to it with some force – clumsily, urgently wanting to bring about every kind of intimate contact with this man.
Qu Moyu paused for a moment, then regained the upper hand, kissing the pair of wet and soft lips with even greater force. His willpower, his breath, and the tip of his tongue were all invaded by the rich perfume of the epiphyllum. The saliva he tasted brought with it a subtle sweetness, the intoxication of wine, making him unable to stop himself from wanting to squeeze out even more of the sweet flavour from the person in his arms.
They kissed roughly and passionately, in an exchange of breath that infiltrated the other’s respiration, spreading rapidly like poison, paralysing every nerve in the body. Any reason would crumble at the slightest provocation under the effects of this aphrodisiac.
Shen Dai was in Qu Moyu’s arms, rubbing up against him and twisting impatiently. Undisguised carnal desire very nearly dominated his mind. He was itching to submerge his entire being in Qu Moyu’s body, to let his epiphyllum pheromones and the ebony wood pheromones fuse together to become one and the same. He was kissed by Qu Moyu until his lips started to hurt and his brain was deprived of oxygen. He whimpered softly and kept his limbs wrapped around him.
Qu Moyu took off his jacket and loosened his tie, at the same time releasing soothing pheromones. With his hand he stroked the bulge through Shen Dai’s trousers, pulling open the zipper as Shen Dai panted softly, before slipping his slender fingers inside. He knew that the Omega he held in his arms couldn’t bear it any further and needed a quick release.
“Euhh…”, Shen Dai hung on weakly to Qu Moyu’s body. He buried his face in the hollow of Qu Moyu’s neck and used his nose to pry open his loosened shirt, so as to deliberately push against that sturdy and wide chest, doing his utmost to sniff, to nuzzle, to lick, to insatiably draw out that powerful Alpha pheromone, even if the temperature of the skin had to be completely subsumed into his own circulation, ceaselessly dominating him.
His organ was fondled by Qu Moyu. The wild and impatient desire within his body suddenly found a direction to rush towards. A string of sticky moans escaped endlessly from his throat.
Then he felt something hard press up against his bottom and instinctively ground up against it, just rubbing through the material was like a spark that could ignite his lust, it was something he wanted so badly to possess.
Qu Moyu drew in a breath. He held down Shen Dai’s waist, biting that tender collarbone as if to punish him, commanding in a deep voice, “Stop moving.”
“I, I want to…”
“I know you do. Bear with it a little.”
Qu Moyu sharpened his teeth on his own lower lip, then ferociously bit down on it, retrieving his lucidity in that brief instant of pain. He had been subjected to training – extremely severe Omega pheromone resistance training. This kind of extreme discipline was something that every S-class Alpha would undergo to prevent themselves from losing control to an Omega’s seduction. To surrender themselves and be taken advantage of that easily, would make them hardly worthy of their name.
But that did not signify that he needed to repress his desires. Since adulthood, the closest he came to losing control was three years ago at the Institute of Rare Earths when he saved an Omega in heat. He had no choice but to give the other party a temporary mark to placate him, otherwise, he too might have lost all sense of rationality. Had they not been in a public place at the time, or even somewhere other than the company, he would have simply done as he pleased. This was the height of power that people were pushed by desire to climb, and while the goal of attaining the summit was to satisfy one’s desires, self-restraint made doing so all the more gratifying.
Back then, he had smelled the fragrance of the epiphyllum that encircled him. As he caressed the trembling, needy body in his arms, the only thing that had filled his mind was insatiable desire.
Not that the thought of that researcher who held on to him tightly and tearfully implored him hadn’t crossed his mind after the incident. He had also started to develop a compulsion for that fragrant sweetness. But he wasn’t about to unnecessarily inconvenience himself for a highly replaceable bed companion, even if by strange chance this person had been sent to his side three years later. From the start, he had never planned on complicating their partnership for a moment’s pleasure.
Except this Omega had been repeatedly presented in front of his mouth. He felt like eating, so why not just devour him?
Finally, they approached the residence. Old Wu drove the car into the underground parking lot. With the coat which was now doused in sex pheromones, Qu Moyu covered Shen Dai’s dishevelled appearance and carried him directly into the lift.
Throughout this short journey, Shen Dai continued to nuzzle against Qu Moyu seductively. Affectionate, eager to please, impatient. This was someone entirely different from that calm and polite – if not aloof – researcher. Just like his pheromones – how faint they were in ordinary times, how thick they were when he was in heat.
The lift went straight up to the second floor. Qu Moyu brought Shen Dai back to his guest room and tossed him onto the bed. Covering Shen Dai with his imposing frame, he pinned him down with force and kissed him. Piece by piece, he stripped off every excessive article of clothing, dragging that pure white body out of the cumbersome fabric to expose every inch of it in front of his eyes.
Indeed, Shen Dai was nothing as frail as your average Omega. His slender physique was both graceful and strong, while his bones were covered by a thin layer of flexible muscle, which appeared neither sinewy nor loose. It seemed that he could just about hold his own, and yet at the same time, it would not be entirely incongruous for him to seek the protection of someone stronger.
This kind of perfect balance was reminiscent of adolescence, beyond which fully-grown Omegas would become too weak, and fully-grown Alphas too strong. For that reason, this beauty – nascent and fleeting, like a budding flower – could really leave a lasting aftertaste.
Qu Moyu kissed Shen Dai’s tear-stained cheek. Catching his already red and swollen lips between his teeth, he swallowed his murmurs into his stomach. His hand caressed that warm skin all over and reached in between the legs – just a touch made his whole hand damp.
Shen Dai instinctively clamped his legs shut, but Qu Moyu used his elbow to pry his knees open, whispering in his ear, “It’s already so wet.”
As Qu Moyu said this, his narrow fingers had already pushed into that slippery crevice, the slick that this Omega released due to his heat was a confirmation that this body had already prepared itself to let him in.
Shen Dai was caught under Qu Moyu’s body, unable to budge.
Having never before experienced the intrusion of a foreign object, his overheated brain put up some instinctive resistance. He tugged at Qu Moyu’s shirt, not knowing if his intention was to push him away or to draw him closer. As the finger rubbed back and forth against his passage, his whole body shuddered. He was unable to stop himself from biting the other’s shoulder.
Qu Moyu lowered his head and bit the tip of Shen Dai’s nose. He murmured, ”You smell so sweet.”
By then, his groin was swollen to the point of aching. As he removed his trousers, his erect organ was primed and ready. Teasingly, it nudged against the opening that was already unbearably soft and wet, yet did not enter.
Desire overwhelmed Shen Dai like a crashing wave. The shirt he pulled at started to tear. He was so captivated by Qu Moyu’s powerful body that he zealously pressed up against it. He was completely enclosed by the thickness of the Alpha pheromones, which seemed to him the safest refuge on earth, the one place he could indulge himself freely and unleash his own nature.
In a daze he pleaded, wishing to be conquered by this person that was to his mind the strongest Alpha.
Qu Moyu’s restraint was already on the brink of collapse. The lengthy and thick organ had turned purplish-red from the constricted blood, the veins were all starting to protuberate. He could only think of ruthlessly pounding that scorching place to his heart’s content, but still, he used his immense self-control to resist.
Pulling Shen Dai’s hand, he guided it to clutch at his erection. As Shen Dai gasped quietly in shock, he rocked gently against the hollow of his palm.
This continued until he heard the sound of knocking on the door.
Once Shen Dai realised that he was about to get up, every fibre of his being became engulfed in fear. Entwining his limbs around Qu Moyu he sobbed, “Don’t. Don’t go. Please don’t go.”
“Be good, I’m not leaving,” said Qu Moyu, kissing the corners of his eyes.
At first, he had wanted to get out of bed to open the door, but Shen Dai had been so deathly afraid that he clung on with a force that was astonishing even to him. For a while, he was unable to get him off at all so he had no choice but to bring him along. He put Shen Dai’s legs around his waist, and with him hanging onto his body in this manner walked towards the door.
Uncle Heng, who had already made preparations much earlier, stood by the door with his back towards it. He had with him some necessities which he passed to Qu Moyu. Although as a Beta he was unable to detect the scent of pheromones, the scent of carnality was by now discernibly thick. He coughed lightly to hide his embarrassment.
As soon as Qu Moyu received the condoms, he quickly slammed the door shut.
Already Shen Dai could hardly think, he had not the faintest idea of the meaning of Qu Moyu’s actions – his sole concern was to not be separated from this person.
Qu Moyu once again pushed Shen Dai back down onto the bed. Using his knees to push open those long, pale legs, he pressed his eager cock against the slightly parted opening. Then, he straightened his back and penetrated him.
Shen Dai abruptly convulsed in violent spasms. His face, which had been filled with orgasmic ecstasy contorted in an instant. He cried out, “It hurts”, and then bit down on his lip.
Qu Moyu had thought that it was excessively tight as well – wasn’t it clearly so wet by now? Taking hold of Shen Dai’s chin between his thumb and finger, he delicately prised his teeth back open.
“Relax a little, have you never done it before?”
Shen Dai shook his head in agony. He gripped Qu Moyu’s arm which was as hard as steel and gasped for breath.
The intimate passage, which had never been explored before, felt as if it had been jabbed all of a sudden by a fire poker; it was so thick, so hard, so hot.
Except not only did the pain not extinguish his sexual desire, on the contrary, the smaller the fire was, the more intensely it burned. Spurred on by the Alpha pheromones, his body yearned to be pounded into.
Qu Moyu bent down and kissed his cheek. He coaxed him softly, “Don’t be nervous. Just relax. It’ll hurt more if you’re tense.”
As a rule, he never slept with inexperienced sexual partners. When it came to the matter of physical satisfaction, he was always the one being indulged. Only maximum indulgence at minimal expense could be considered as not a waste of time. But at this moment, he displayed a patience and tenderness that even he himself was not aware of.
Propping up Shen Dai’s bottom deftly with one hand, he pulled a pillow over and placed it under his waist. He spread Shen Dai’s legs wide apart, and then, withdrawing by just a little, firmly slid his organ back inside.
He could experience the sensation of moving through that stuffy passage inch by inch; the friction from being tightly enclosed just felt so good.
The more Shen Dai trembled and wept, the more Qu Moyu came to understand the pleasure of conquest – the fragrance of the epiphyllum had so thoroughly intoxicated his mind. He caught the hand on his chest that was pushing him away and pinned it to the bed, then, moving his waist, he plunged in the entire length of his cock.
Shen Dai let out a moan choked with tears, his anguish was also mingled with indecency – that was the splash of water in a wok of sizzling oil, thoroughly causing him to boil over, and it was in this way that the pleasure surged up violently and struck him, washing away what scant awareness he had left.
He clenched his insides involuntarily, not wanting to let go of what was within him, to interlock with it tightly, never to separate.
Qu Moyu was holding his leg up with one hand, and kneading the flesh of his buttock with the other. He pulled out his cock only to plunge it back in even deeper, then started pumping in ferociously.
His thrusts were too deep – so deep that they kept hitting the reproductive cavity; his duplicitous animal instincts were compelling him to break in and plant his seed, to carry out the reproductive duty that was engraved in his genes.
Mercilessly enticed by that heavy fragrance, his fingers grabbed so hard onto Shen Dai’s soft, white thighs that they left red marks. He slammed against that perfectly round and firm ass with repeated slaps.
Shen Dai was being fucked to the point where he couldn’t stop moaning. That was a sound that he would have never believed could come out of his mouth If he still had all his senses – a sound that was cloying, and obscene, and emotional. That stiff and hot cock drove in and out of him in consistently fast and vigorous thrusts, each bringing boundless stimulation. From head to toe, every nerve and every cell was clamouring for the utmost pleasure. A shot of electricity through his body turned it numb, and then a viscous white fluid spurted out from the tip of his penis.
Qu Moyu pulled out his slick wet cock, grabbing Shen Dai by his ankle. He flipped him over, pushing him down by his neck and forcing him to lift his ass. With Shen Dai on all fours in front of him, he pushed in hard from behind.
“Ahh—” the body was incredibly sensitive after ejaculation, even the slightest stimulation gave Shen Dai the numbing and tingling sensation of biting ants. He could distinctly feel Qu Moyu’s large cock piercing through the inside of his body.
Looking below him, he could get a view of that fierce and frightening object pummeling him over and over. When it reached its deepest point he could even see a slight protrusion on his flat stomach. He was so tormented by this wild pleasure to the point of breaking down and screaming, except his Alpha was far from sated.
Shen Dai buried his head in the covers, sobbing and crying out, the upper half of his body was doubled over in an unimaginable curve, revealing his hole to the fullest extent for his Alpha.
He pleaded while whimpering, ”Bite me, please bite me, I beg you…” He wanted to be marked, he frantically wanted to be marked. An Omega in heat craved to be marked by his Alpha, just as a survivor stranded on a barren island craved for food and water.
Qu Moyu looked down at Shen Dai with disdain. That thin and slender waistline, the wing-like arch of his shoulder blades, that gradually reddening and increasingly swollen gland, he could barely stop himself from grinding his canine teeth. He leaned forward, the tip of his nose hovering just above the gland and took in a deep sniff. An inebriating floral perfume pervaded his senses. It was difficult to fathom how an Omega with such a faint pheromone scent in normal times could have pheromones that were so thick and so intense during his heat. If even he was on the verge of succumbing, then what other Alpha could resist this? Just the thought of Shen Dai being able to effortlessly lure in other Alphas, to draw in a pack of wolves around him made him suddenly overcome by indignation and jealousy. Opening his mouth, he hovered his canine teeth over that white nape, greedy drops of saliva dripping from his mouth. The gland emanated a fragrant and sweet aroma, tempting him to bite it, just ruthlessly bite it! Mark his prey and possess it forever!
Reason held him back at the limit. Qu Moyu pierced his lip with his canine teeth once again, using the pain to stir his lust-addled mind back to consciousness – no, it was more like shock – he was shocked to consciousness, realising he had allowed himself to be enticed up to this point. He really had the intention of giving away his mark!
Astonishment turned into rage, Qu Moyu didn’t dare believe that an utterly ordinary Omega could shake his power of self-control. His bloodshot eyes were stained with anger, once more he seized the back of Shen Dai’s neck, blocking the gland that was incessantly releasing that enticing fragrance with his hand. He started brutally fucking that honeyed orifice, every stroke both forceful and cruel, with total disregard if he hit that soft reproductive cavity or not. This unrestrained thrusting to the fullest gave him the pleasure of a savage wolf. His hips undulated tirelessly; he knew that as long as he kept pounding this secret passage, he would receive an endless supply of stimulation.
“Ahh…please stop…it hurts…ahhhh…”, Shen Dai’s neck was held down in a vice-like grip, his body couldn’t even keep up with the momentum and moved forward to slow down the onslaught from behind him, rigidly sustaining every ruthless blow. He could only respond by continuously moaning and begging. Pain and pleasure ran in parallel pathways within his body, obliterating whatever willpower he had, reducing him thoroughly to become a slave to carnal desire.
In his chaotic subconscious, he knew that this act of begging to be marked had enraged his Alpha. In his chaotic subconscious, he knew that this person wasn’t his Alpha, that this person wasn’t his.
The quilt was damp with tears. Even if he was overwhelmed by his heat at this moment, he could still feel an indescribable sadness.
Shen Dai’s heart was sinking, but his body was unceasingly clambering towards the peak of desire.
His hole became soaked, every thrust was accompanied by a lewd slippery sound, he was once again brought to climax by Qu Moyu.
His body had been so thoroughly fucked it was as if it had turned to pulp; his legs could not stop quivering. He could not even kneel and needed to rely on Qu Moyu to prop up his waist so that he would not keel over in bed.
But Qu Moyu switched his position to make him lie on his side, held him tightly and then started a fresh round of assault.
A top-tier Alpha’s stamina could surpass the imagination of the average person. Qu Moyu had only come once after making Shen Dai come three times. And this was only the start of his heat.
A condom filled with semen had been tossed onto the expensive wool carpet. Was that just some rubbish? No, the sperm of a top-tier Alpha could fetch anywhere between a million to ten million yuan on the black market. Even if there was no guarantee of conceiving equally superior offspring, it would give the highest probability of doing so, Moreover, in the case where a paternity test could be obtained, one could potentially walk away with untold riches and secure their upward social mobility. This is why top-tier Alphas would always take strict precautions to guard against those with ill intent.
Qu Moyu wrapped Shen Dai in his arms. Their sweat-drenched bodies were inseparably close – hearts pressed up against each other but not beating in tune.
Only having quelled their urgent desire would an Omega in heat regain brief sobriety, at least until the next recurrence of heat. But Shen Dai had no wish for this kind of sobriety, not knowing at all how to face Qu Moyu, nor how to face the person that he was right now.
Qu Moyu knew well what this sudden “cooling” from the man in his arms meant. Teasing a lock of Shen Dai’s damp hair around his finger, he gently asked, “Feeling a bit better?”
Shen Dai stiffened for a moment, not daring to look up or move. It seemed if he just stayed still, he could pretend as if nothing had happened. Of course he knew this was just a form of avoidance, but apart from that, what else could he do? Should he apologise – since it was his lack of control that had caused trouble for others? Perhaps he should express his gratitude – since it was once again Qu Moyu who had “resolved” his problem? What should he say? What should he do? What could possibly ease the shame and embarrassment he was feeling at this moment?
Qu Moyu chuckled a little, which had the slight nasal tone of someone that had eaten his fill. It sounded as if he were in a good mood. “Only feeling embarrassed now? Isn’t it a bit too late for that?”
Shen Dai felt even more ashamed. As if by reflex, he wanted to curl up into a ball, to put a distance between him and Qu Moyu through this protective foetal position. But Qu Moyu stuck his leg between his legs to stop him from doing so, at the same time dropping warm kisses on his eyelids that were already red and swollen from crying.
The more distressed Shen Dai appeared, the more Qu Moyu wanted to tease him: “Too late.”
“I…I didn’t do it intentionally.” said Shen Dai, using his palms to cover his eyes that had just been kissed. It was as if an enchantment had been placed on them, he could not prevent his tears from flowing at once. The hormones released during his heat magnified his emotions by a hundredfold. He had the impression that the one controlling his thoughts and actions at this moment was not his original self at all, and yet his perception of things was so real and distinct. The feeling was just too awful, yet it could make one indulge with no way of freeing themselves.
“Which part wasn’t intentional? Was it accidentally going into heat, or looking for me for help?”
“That was only because you helped me in the past.”
Shen Dai wanted so much to clarify things in detail. After all, this had already occurred twice at the office, and on both occasions he went into heat in front of Qu Moyu. Really, it seemed as if he was doing it on purpose. Did Qu Moyu think of him as a schemer willing to resort to crude tactics with no regard for consequence?
On the other hand he worried that the more he explained, the more calculated it would seem. He might only be making things worse. Struggling feebly, he said, “It was because Qu Chengchen-” After all, if not for Qu Chengchen making things difficult for him, how else could things have turned out the way they did?
Hearing this name, Qu Moyu frowned: “Forget it.” He hadn’t felt like hearing the Omega he had just possessed – his lawful wife that was presently nestled in his arms – talking about another Alpha.
This expression of displeasure only further confirmed Shen Dai’s suspicions: Whatever he said now would just sound like an excuse. He bit his lip. “President Qu…”
“You can call me by my name”, said Qu Moyu, cutting him off.
“…” Shen Dai hesitated for a moment, still somewhat unable to say it. Even if they already had that kind of relationship, it still seemed to him as overstepping. After all, apart from the fact that they had slept together, nothing else had changed.
Qu Moyu caressed his back: “Just say it, it’s alright.”
These two syllables were like freshly roasted chestnuts in his mouth – sweet, yet scalding.
“Would it be possible to get me a high-efficacy inhibitor?” In fact, Shen Dai really wanted to ask Qu Moyu how come he hadn’t sent him to a clinic or the pharmacy earlier before.
“That stuff is really harmful for your body.”
Qu Moyu held Shen Dai in his arms and turned him over, making him lie face-down on top of him, his hand deceivingly sliding back and forth over his soft and delicate skin.
“It was partly because of me that you went into heat this time. You have me now, you don’t need inhibitors.”
Shen Dai glanced at Qu Moyu in astonishment, then quickly avoided his gaze.
For a moment he was unable to process what he had just heard. It had a kind of ambiguousness: like there might be something there yet not, that it might well be true or untrue. He understood every individual word, but joined together, he could not grasp the meaning and sentiments behind it.
”Spread your legs a little”, said Qu Moyu, giving his bottom a pat. His breathing turned slow and heavy. “Put it inside yourself. Can you do it?”
Only then did Shen Dai realise that Qu Moyu had gotten hard again. Already he was clearly hungry and tired, but under the incitation of the Alpha pheromones, he couldn’t help getting worked up as well.
”If you can’t do it then you should learn. And you’re so very good at learning, aren’t you?” Qu Moyu edged closer to his neck, biting his slightly-raised Adam’s apple lightly.
“I make you feel good, don’t I? Which is why you should learn how to make me feel good too.”
Shen Dai shamefully responded with a “mhm” before he was savagely entered again. He could only suck in his breath and adapt to it.
“I’m going to stay with you throughout your heat, and give you many other incentives. Just be obedient and everything will be alright.” Qu Moyu pulled Shen Dai’s head down to lick and kiss his mouth. While his actions were rough, his voice was perfectly gentle, “Be good, and don’t bring up ‘marking’ again, alright?”
Shen Dai’s heart was seized in a flash. It was a kind of indescribable pain, a blend of humiliation, embarrassment and sadness. He responded softly, “Alright.”
By not using an authoritative voice, it could be said that Qu Moyu was already showing him some face, so, did his “alright” sound a little more dignified than “okay”?
He buried his face in the hollow of Qu Moyu’s neck, his body matched the rhythm of his Alpha’s movements; he was physically and mentally powerless to stop it.
Qu Moyu could not resist stroking Shen Dai’s feverish gland with his index finger, prompting it to release even more of that inebriating floral aroma.
He was pleased with Shen Dai; This person was intelligent and tactful in every sense, and also happened to be his legal wife. To add to that, he was surprisingly pure and delectable. Since things had already gotten to this point, they could both take what they wanted from each other. He would have access to enjoyable, convenient and risk-free sex, while Shen Dai would get…a great deal of benefits. Needless to say, there should be no reason for Shen Dai to object.
After sunset, Uncle Heng once again knocked on the door and entered. He brought food and a custom-made bite stopper. It had been many years since Qu Moyu had last used the thing so it wasn’t at his home but at his family’s. To avoid any probing questions from his parents, Auntie Lan had returned – ostensibly to fetch a few things – and retrieved it in secret, which was why it had taken so long to arrive.
From the start, Qu Moyu hadn’t wanted to use it. For an Alpha to use a bite-stopper meant that he lacked confidence in his own self-control. Before this, he had never worried about having an urge to mark anyone, except he had not anticipated how far Shen Dai could entice him and break through his defences.
In his most intoxicated moments, when he was completely bewitched by the fragrance of the epiphyllum, an intense primal urge arose in him, an urge to completely possess his prey. It had been way too risky. If he wanted to indulge, then he would need to use the bite stopper.
After ten hours of deep slumber, Shen Dai awoke from his exhaustion. He was truly awake now: in mind and in body.
This time his heat ended after three days, which made Qu Moyu suspect even more that his glands were underdeveloped. Qu Moyu offered to send him to consult with some of the most renowned doctors, but Shen Dai brushed off his suggestion. If you asked him, this was a blessing and he had no desire at all to treat it.
Those lewd, absurd and frenzied three days in which he had lost himself as if bewitched by poison, those three days drenched in carnal desire, really should have ended much earlier. Because Qu Moyu was not his Alpha. His heat was not a time for them to bond or enjoy a harmony of minds and bodies. Nor had it been a period for them to consummate their affections. It was simply a means of release.
The further he succumbed, the more painful it would be when he reawakened.
When he finally woke up, he had difficulty adapting to this new relationship between him and Qu Moyu.
Qu Moyu must have believed that – no, anyone – even himself, would have believed that he was the one getting the better end of the deal. For a first class Alpha to condescend to sleep with an ordinary Omega – whatever the reason – was generally seen as a form of charity in this messed-up society. After all, he was the one who went into heat in front of the other person, so he completely deserved what he got.
Besides, he did like Qu Moyu, yet somehow had never fantasised about sleeping with him before. Except now he felt neither the happiness nor satisfaction of having his hopes realised, only a sense of disappointment and fear.
Between the very first time that Qu Moyu had saved him and right before they got married, he always looked at Qu Moyu the way one would look up at the sky with yearning. A kind of abstract love that wouldn’t hurt if his feelings were left unrequited. After all, everyone sang the praises of the sun, moon and stars, but who would dream of owning them for themselves?
But when their names were inscribed on the same red booklet, when they lived in the same house and rode the same car to work, when they shared both conversation and physical contact, there were already innumerable threads binding the both of them. And with every inch he took, the greedier he became. He could see this unfortunate and reckless aspect of human nature quite clearly, but he couldn’t stop his own heart. What other choice did he have but to act with restraint – taking all his longing for Qu Moyu and enclosing it behind high walls, while waiting for his feelings to wear away with time.
Except now the game was up. They had shared their bodies and exchanged heartfelt embraces, monopolising each other for a brief moment in time. The walls had come crashing down.
He wanted more, so much more. Except what he wanted was exactly what Qu Moyu would never give him. His own rational mind was telling him to resist chasing hopeless endeavours.
To desire what he could never have would eventually become his inner demon.
How could he not be afraid?
1. His face, which had been filled with orgasmic ecstasy | 春潮的脸, literal: Spring Tide Face, orgasmic face, similar to the Japanese term Agehao (アヘ顔)