Apex Predator - Chap 50

Shen Dai shut himself in his room for an entire day, assessing his present situation. Feelings of hurt and anger kept interrupting his thoughts, dragging him into a pit of anxiety. At times, thinking back on Qu Moyu’s expression and all the things he had said to him, his tears would start to fall without warning.

He wanted so badly to sleep, to see if he would wake up to realise that he was only having a nightmare, that Qu Moyu was still holding him tightly and refusing to let him go, saying all those silly but sweet words he would only have said during his rut.

But he couldn’t fall asleep. Night after night, he struggled to drift off.

In the midst of all this turmoil, counting the seconds that passed, he finally concluded two things.

The first – that he loved Qu Moyu. Regardless of how this mark came about, they had both become someone the other could never forget. The influence of a mark was no lesser than blood ties. Even if an Alpha and Omega were complete strangers, they would still come to gradually love each other after the mark was made. Qu Moyu and him had a mark, had a marriage, had spent happy times together, and might even already have a child together. He had an absolute advantage. He couldn’t just give up on the possibility that Qu Moyu might love him.

The second – They had lived together day after day for the greater part of a year. Anyone was bound to have feelings. Qu Moyu’s reaction had all been due to a misunderstanding. So long as he proved his innocence, so long as the misunderstanding was cleared up, there was no way Qu Moyu could be that heartless.

He kept repeating to himself silently: “Focus on results and solve the problem.”

He got out of bed, took a cold shower, got his voice recorder ready, and then dialled Shen Qin’s number.

The call went on ringing for a long time before it was picked up. Shen Qin answered with a weak “Hello?”, unable to hide his guilty conscience.

Shen Dai cut straight to the point. “How do you know Qu Chengchen?” he asked icily.

“He just happened to be there the time I went to see You Xinghai,” replied Shen Qin, in a soft voice.

“Then how did you find out Qu Moyu’s identity? “

“When the founder of Xingzhou passed away, I happened to see his car on television”

“Did you even consider the repercussions of your actions?” Shen Dai clenched his fist into a ball. Perhaps not confronting Shen Qin face-to-face had been a blessing in disguise. Had Shen Qin been standing before him now, he didn’t know if he would be able to control the urge to hit him.

“I only did it for your…”

“You dare say that you did it for my sake!” hissed Shen Dai.

A few rapid breaths came from the other end of the phone. “You and him are already married. Did you really not want him to mark you?” Shen Qin had changed his submissive demeanour two days before, his tone of voice becoming scathing.

“You should be grateful to me. That’s the future successor to Xingzhou there. Do you honestly believe that a B-class Omega like you could ever hope to receive an S-class Alpha’s mark in your entire lifetime? I’m your father. Isn’t it the same whether it was for your sake or my own!”

Shen Dai was so furious his whole body was trembling: “But getting his mark this way will destroy my relationship with him. Did that even occur to you? You don’t care about anything at all! You only care about yourself!”

“As long as you have a mark, you’ll have everything else,” Shen Qin went on with excitement, “A-Dai, listen to me. He will be soft-hearted towards you. As time goes on, the effects of the mark will only get stronger. Just wait till you have his child, he won’t be able to do anything to make things difficult for you. In the future, you’ll have everything you could ever want.”

“That must have been what you thought back then,” stated Shen Dai, coldly.

There was silence at the other end of the line.

“Since you weren’t able to get You Xinghai’s mark, you tried to use me to pressure him. But in the end, you got nothing at all, only the burden that was me.“ Shen Dai bitterly closed his eyes. He thought that he would never again shed another tear because of Shen Qin, but at this very moment, the wound from his father’s neglect during childhood, a time when he needed love the most, was once again reopened.

Through gritted teeth, he said, “You ruined your own life, and now you want to ruin mine as well.”

During that period of mutual affection, he had yearned for Qu Moyu’s mark. He had been inching closer to Qu Moyu’s heart, step by step, walking through that door, step by step. But now this door had been ruthlessly shut in his face.

“It’s exactly because I didn’t want you to be like me,” retorted Shen Qin, his voice choked up with sobs. If I only had a mark, how could I have sunk into such a pitiful state?”

“I’m not going to be like you,” said Shen Dai, vigorously wiping his teary eyes. “I will never, ever, be like you.”

Hanging up the phone, he collapsed into a chair, exhausted, unable to calm his racing heartbeat for a very long time.

Because he had Shen Qin as a cautionary tale, he had always rejected this behaviour of Omegas attempting to bind an Alpha to them solely through a mark. He didn’t believe that happiness could be attained by forcibly binding someone at the physiological level against their will. Unfortunately, Shen Qin lacked this clarity, thinking that all the failures and unhappiness in his life were the result of not obtaining an Alpha’s mark.

No doubt that Shen Qin was both pitiable and detestable, but his assessment of how much a mark could affect a person was not wrong – or at least, the influence it had on an Omega was tremendous.

Back when he hadn’t been marked, Shen Dai had been forced to be docile and submissive due to Qu Moyu’s superior status and genetics. Despite this, he maintained his self-respect and pride under the surface. Wanting Qu Moyu to fall for him, he willingly offered him his love and devotion. A mark was supposed to be that promise of commitment that would come naturally when the time was right. To obtain one otherwise was like putting the cart before the horse.

And yet, after being marked, an intense psychological dependence towards his Alpha began to emerge within him. As soon as he thought about how Qu Moyu wanted him to remove the mark, he became so distressed he didn’t know what to do.

Having calmed himself down for a moment, he sent yet another WeChat message to You Baiyue:

“Give me Qu Chengchen’s number. Then in the future, you can also “make appropriate use” of me at an appropriate time. Isn’t that the reason you’ve been so adamant about building a relationship with me?”

Though he didn’t know how much You Baiyue had planned, it was evident that he possessed a certain value in You Baiyue’s eyes.

Just as expected, not long after, You Baiyue called him back.

“It’s not that I don’t want to give it to you. It’s just that it’s pointless,” explained You Baiyue, sounding lethargic and unconcerned. “Right now the both of them are so busy their feet are barely touching the ground. Where would they find the time to bother with you?”

“If he’s going to deliberately hurt me like this, I have no option but to…”

“Stop, stop, stop!” You Baiyue interrupted, making a tsk-tsk noise. “I have to say, you are so clueless about the world. Come on, wake up a little! You want to Qu Chengchen a call? What on earth do you expect him to do for you? You’re just a pawn he’s played and has no use for any longer. He’s not going to lift a finger for you, and what exactly can you do to him anyway?”

You Baiyue sighed, “Right now, you feel like you’ve been wronged, so you want to vindicate yourself. Let me tell you, whether you are innocent or not is of no importance to them. Money is important, stocks are important, power is important – you are not. Let’s say Yu-ge knows that you weren’t the one who did it. Then what? Aren’t you still the cause of all the fires he’s putting out right now?”

Shen Dai wanted to protest that he wasn’t the one at fault, but when he opened his mouth, no words came out. Though he resisted everything that You Baiyue was saying, he knew that they were in all likelihood the truth.

“Sigh, let me give you some clear-headed advice, alright?” said You Baiyue, turning himself over, “I’ve seen Omegas like you before — never dated anyone, idealistic, with a strong sense of self-worth, putting a lot of weight into those so-called feelings, thinking they can secure their beloved Alpha for life through stereotypical notions of love and marriage.”

At this point, his tone became extremely disdainful. “I already told you, Top alphas have no feelings. Even though I’m not familiar with the details of your relationship, I can guess pretty easily what’s going on. Let’s see, Yu-ge treats you rather well, doesn’t he? Showering you with kindness one day and sending you little gifts the next? Is that supposed to mean something? Which owner wouldn’t give their pet a pat on the head or a treat if the pet pleases them? But what happens when the pet bites back?”

Shen Dai’s expression darkened slightly. He felt a sudden chill run down his spine. Despite it being a warm spring day, it felt like he had taken a step back into winter.

“Ultimately, you still lack experience and a deep understanding of alphas, which is why you have such unrealistic fantasies. If I just tell this to you, you probably won’t believe me, you to have to step on a landmine yourself before you truly understand, but when you start to meddle with an Alpha’s core interests, they can turn hostile very quickly. You must have experienced this firsthand in the past few days, right?”

He said this so lightly and frivolously, yet landing upon Shen Dai’s shoulders, these words became infinitely heavy.

“I’ll offer you some advice in good conscience: if it turns out you are pregnant, make sure to have the child. But after you’ve given birth, do what Yu-ge tells you and have the mark removed. No matter what, do not go up against him. As long as you listen to what he asks, sweet-talk him a little, you still have a chance of staying by his side. And even if you can’t, you and your future progeny will be set for life. This is already the best possible outcome. Don’t have any excessive expectations for anything else.”

Shen Dai finally broke his silence, his voice quiet and composed. “You Baiyue, you and I are nothing alike – our backgrounds, knowledge, the cards we’ve been dealt are all different, which is why our perspectives and choices are different. I don’t try to teach you, and I have no need for you to teach me, either. I may have illusions about emotions, but I have no illusions about life. You’re just the opposite — you assume you can depend on someone else for your livelihood, while I assume I can place my emotions in someone else’s hands. Is either more right than the other? Even if feelings were to fall apart, my life would stay intact. Conversely, how are you so sure you can depend on someone else for a lifetime of wealth and high status?”

This time, it was You Baiyue who was silent.

“The things we want are worlds apart. So, your “advice” is meaningless to me.”

You Baiyue helplessly forced a laugh, “Indeed. Sooner or later you will understand.”

Hanging up the telephone, Shen Dai stared dazedly at the empty white wall.

He had been so sure of himself when he was trying to refute You Baiyue, but how could he not have some doubts?

Were his expectations of feelings just an unrealistic fantasy? All because the person he liked was a top Alpha?