Apex Predator - Chap 56
Mrs Qu took Shen Dai to a private hospital, where an elderly doctor, who appeared to be a rehired retiree, examined him.
While the doctor attended to Shen Dai, Mrs. Qu stepped outside to avoid making him feel uncomfortable. Despite her efforts, Shen Dai still felt awkward. Given his circumstances, he could only hide his emotions and describe his situation to the doctor.
After listening to his explanation, the doctor nodded: “So, you’re divorced, and the pheromone level of your ex-husband is S. You want to give birth and then have the mark removed.”
Shen Dai wanted to clarify the cause-and-effect relationship that the doctor seemed to be implying in those words, but, deciding it was unnecessary, he just nodded along.
“In this circumstance, the best solution would be to have your ex-husband cooperate by extracting some pheromones from his gland to help you through the pregnancy. Once the baby is born, the mark can then be removed.”
“He doesn’t consent to me having this child, so he’s not going to help me.”
The doctor raised an eyebrow: “Then why did you agree to the divorce? He is not allowed to divorce you while you are pregnant. As long as you don’t get divorced and want to have the baby, he would be obliged to cooperate with you”.
Shen Dai cast his eyes downward. How could he even begin to explain the complicated situation behind all of this to a stranger?
“Doctor, isn’t there any other way? Can’t we use universal or artificially synthesised pheromones?”
“Theoretically, it is possible. In my lifetime of experience as a reproductive medicine doctor, I have assisted many omegas by using substitute pheromones to aid in treatment or manage various conditions. However, the pheromones of an S-class alpha are too potent and exceptionally difficult to replace. I have never come across a case like yours before. Given the exceedingly low incidence rate, it’s difficult to find instances of either success or failure. As the foetus is still small, its need for alpha pheromones is not yet apparent. However, the effect of alpha pheromones on the foetus will become more pronounced as it develops and grows. Judging from my experience, the likelihood of a successful outcome in such cases is very low.”
Shen Dai’s face turned ashen. His lips slightly trembling, he lowered his head helplessly.
The doctor looked at Shen Dai, slightly sympathetic. “The viability of the child’s birth, its potential health status, and your safety during the childbirth are all factors that I cannot guarantee. Should your alpha be unable to help you, it might be best to terminate the pregnancy.”
After a prolonged silence, Shen Dai, grappling with heart-wrenching pain, asked, “Isn’t there… any other way?”
“Regretfully, there is virtually no other way. If you didn’t have a mark, the situation might have been more manageable. Without it, the alpha pheromones would not have fused so deeply with both you and the unborn child in your womb, and the use of substitute pheromones would have been a viable option.”
Shen Dai was so distressed he didn’t know what to do. He wanted to hide his hands in his lab coat pockets, searching absently for a while before realising that he hadn’t worn one for a very long time.
He had already prepared himself for everything, and when it came to what he would have to give up for this child, there was no consideration of value or worth, only the realisation of whether he was willing or not. But as it turned out, he couldn’t keep the child at all. Over many nights spent tossing and turning, he brutally stripped away the layers of experience and understanding that he had built up over the last twenty-eight years, laying bare his most true self. With a sacrificial solemnity, he had finally made his decision. And now it seemed that it had simply been a joke.
Yet he had already imagined countless times meeting this child in the future, and had already felt a gentle seed quietly germinating within his body. He had started to look forward to having someone who would love him wholeheartedly and unconditionally.
Were they destined to part before even having the chance to meet?
Only when faced with the reality of losing his child did Shen Dai understand why he was so persistently – even insanely – determined to have it: because he longed to have someone in his family.
He never really had parents in the true sense of the word. His grandmother wouldn’t be with him for many years longer. The heart he had entrusted to Qu Moyu had been shattered and trampled on the ground. Soon, with his grandmother’s passing, he would be left without a family. And without a family, he would have no home. The thought of it alone was enough to swallow him up in boundless loneliness.
His heart was filled with despair and helplessness; perhaps this was just his fate.
Seeing Shen Dai’s preoccupied and lost state, the doctor comforted him, “My child, you are still young. There’s a whole new chapter of life waiting for you, and you will one day find an alpha to have a child with. Try to embrace what lies ahead.”
Shen Dai quickly wiped away his falling tears, his voice hoarse as he said, “Thank you.”
“No need to thank me, I didn’t help much.”
“Can you arrange for me to have the operation to remove the mark as soon as possible?” Shen Dai tried desperately to control himself, but his voice was still shaking. “Best if it’s today, best if it’s right now.”
He would ‘return’ the mark to Qu Moyu, as if it were an engagement present.
“It’s too rushed,” the doctor answered, looking at his watch. “You’ll need to take an array of tests. Given your current mental state, you’re not in the right condition to operate. Why not rest for a few days, and then we can arrange it?”
“I’m physically fit and don’t have any issues,” insisted Shen Dai, staring intently into the doctor’s eyes.”I want to have the mark removed immediately.”
The smell of ebony wood which had once caused him endless infatuation, was now something he couldn’t bear for a second longer. He wanted to get rid of the mark immediately, to erase Qu Moyu’s imprint on his body and soul. He wanted to forever sever all ties with the person who was forcing him to kill his own child.
The doctor, finding himself in a very difficult position, glanced at his watch again: “This timing is really too rushed.” He picked up the phone on the desk, “Xiao Zhao, please come to my office.” After a while, a nurse knocked on the door and came in. Mrs. Qu, who had been waiting at the door, also joined her and gave Shen Dai an inquisitive look.
Shen Dai looked back at her, his gaze hollow, a deathly stillness in his eyes. Mrs Qu’s expression quickly darkened. The doctor and nurse discussed the possibility of scheduling the operation and at the same time respectfully asked for Mrs Qu’s opinion.
“The operation will be carried out today?” Mrs Qu looked at Shen Dai with concern. “You don’t need to be in such a hurry. I’ll help you find a place to settle down first. Besides, it’s already late today.”
Shen Dai shook his head stiffly: “Please, I’d like to have the mark removed at once.” These alpha pheromones were like a nightmare, releasing physiological dependency and sweet memories on one hand, while showing callous behaviour and cruel disdain on the other. The cold and astringent fragrance of the ebony wood, which had once been a source of joy and fantasy, had transformed into thorny vines binding him, relentlessly constricting, constricting, and constricting even further, draining his blood, stealing his breath, and inflicting endless agony and terror.
He just wanted to get away.
Mrs. Qu looked at him in silence for a long while, then turned to ask the doctor, “Can it be arranged for today?”
“Given Mr Shen’s current physical condition which is not optimal, we don’t recommend doing this in such a hurry,” the doctor replied with resignation. However, if Mr Shen insists, we are prepared to work overtime. He asked Shen Dai again for confirmation, “Mr Shen, the removal of the mark and the abortion must be done together. Are you prepared for that?”
Shen Dai stared blankly at the doctor. He had to abort the child at the same time? Today? Right now?
Was he prepared for this?
“Does it necessarily have to be done…at the same time?” he murmured.
The nurse replied in a soft and gentle voice, “It is recommended that we perform both procedures together. Once the anaesthetic is administered, the foetus can’t be retained. While the removal of the mark is minimally invasive, the abortion has a significant impact on the body. We are concerned that your body may not be able to withstand both at the same time.
Shen Dai bowed his head slightly, staring at his belly without moving at all. He had never felt more helpless than he did at this moment, nor had he ever faced a more difficult decision.
“Mr. Shen, you might want to reconsider a little, for the sake of your health.”
Amidst Shen Dai’s chaotic thoughts, a sudden blinding flash hit him like a shooting star, and he tried desperately to grasp it. He looked up abruptly, his attention fixed on the nurse: “Can I just have the mark removed?
The nurse was startled by the bright gleam in his eyes: “Uh?”
“If I have the mark removed, couldn’t the child rely on substitute pheromones?” asked Shen Dai, turning towards the doctor like a drowning person grasping at a last lifeline.
The doctor also seemed somewhat bewildered, “What do you mean?”
Mrs Qu looked at Shen Dai with equal confusion. She was starting to worry about his mental state.
“It’s only three weeks old and not fully developed, so the influence of alpha pheromones shouldn’t have much of an effect yet, correct?” Shen Dai rose to his feet excitedly, “If I have the mark removed now, the foetus could use alternative pheromones without it, right?”
The nurse looked at Shen Dai with some sympathy: “Mr Shen, you may not have heard clearly. The operation requires anaesthesia, which could have an effect on the foetus…”
“Then don’t use anaesthesia.”
The three people in the room all looked at Shen Dai in shock.
Though his face was pale and he appeared dispirited, his eyes alone shone with clarity and resolve.
Taking off his glasses, the elderly doctor vigorously wiped the sweat from his brow, as if he couldn’t believe what he had just heard.
“Doctor, you mentioned just now that as long as I don’t have a mark, I can use substitute pheromones to aid in giving birth,” said Shen Dai, clenching his fists tightly as his fingernails dug deep into his flesh, using the pain to achieve an intense clarity. “While it’s still not fully formed and not yet dependent on alpha pheromones, please help me remove the mark now. I can… undergo the procedure without anaesthesia.”
The nurse gasped, “This… Mr. Shen, this is insane. While the mark’s removal is minimally invasive and typically done with local anaesthesia, it still requires an incision. This type of pain is beyond what most people can bear.”
“I’m not like most people,” Shen Dai replied deliberately, pausing between each word.
Recovering from her shock, Mrs Qu pulled Shen Dai aside: “A-Dai, have you lost your mind? Without anaesthesia?! Don’t, don’t do this, Moyu is my son, but… no one is worth this.”
“My child is worth it.” Shen Dai gently took Mrs Qu’s hand and smiled, “I’m not doing this for Moyu. Maybe what I’ve said lacks conviction for now, but once the mark is removed and there is no longer a connection between us, my child will only be mine. I am doing this for myself.
Mrs Qu looked at Shen Dai steadily, her tears spilling down without warning. She gripped Shen Dai’s hand tightly, her voice a mixture of laughter and tears, “If I’d had half your courage back then, I wouldn’t have had to live with this pain my whole life. Go now, don’t let yourself have any regrets.”
