Be My Baby - Vol.2 Chapter 5 Part 1
As expected, when he arrived at Seonjung’s hospital and explained the situation, what came back was a very brief curse.
As Seonwoo sat there with an indifferent face, now unfazed by this level of cursing, Seonjung sighed and leaned back in his chair.
“So what did you decide to do?”
“I don’t know either, that’s why I came to you, prepared to be cursed at.”
At Seonwoo’s answer that he wouldn’t have come to his brother if it wasn’t certain he’d be cursed at and hit, Seonjung frowned.
When this lacking brother had a problem, the first person he always sought was definitely Jeon Seyoon.
And he was the second.
So if he was deliberately seeking him out now…
“Seyoon’s not answering his phone?”
“I think he blocked my number.”
“Ah…”
I should do that too, Seonjung thought, but seeing that Seonwoo had come all the way to the hospital without contacting him, he must have been aware of that possibility too.
So unless he takes a vacation and runs away right now, blocking calls is meaningless.
“So, anyway… to summarize the situation so far, he can’t write the consent form but he’ll raise the child, so you should figure it out yourself, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Then give him the baby. And get the consent form.”
“I want to raise the baby myself.”
Seonwoo showed a quite firm reaction for him, as if he couldn’t give that up no matter what.
While he understood that it was hard to give up the result of a 10-year one-sided love right in front of him, even if it was troublesome and clingy, there’s a limit to everything, so Seonjung stared blankly at his brother.
“I’m telling you this really seriously, do you want to ruin your life at just twenty-seven?”
“That’s… not it.”
“Then do everything the senior wants. You’ve grown up being so pampered that you don’t seem to know how scary the world is… Even now, there are a lot of people secretly plotting against you. There are tons of people watching you with fire in their eyes, ready to pull you down if they catch even one small fault.”
Seonjung expressed his concern, as no matter how foolish he was, he was still his brother, and Seonwoo tilted his head slightly and asked back.
“Why?”
“Why? Because you keep completing what other people are researching first, so everyone’s losing motivation. Plus, you release all information openly, so there are a lot of researchers complaining that they can’t get investments. And you, honestly, you’re trash in real life, but you’re excessively brilliant in that field. A nail that sticks out gets hammered down. Or completely pulled out.”
Lee Seonwoo had spent a peaceful childhood and adolescence surrounded only by people who adored him, and even in his teenage years when there was more than a truckload of jealous people, he had lived an easy life using his characteristic dullness and optimistic personality as weapons.
The thing people find most frustrating and hurtful in life is human relationships, but Lee Seonwoo’s human relationships were incredibly simple, and even in that simple relationship diagram, he was extremely lucky to have met only people who found him cute and indulged him.
Thanks to that, although he himself was completely unaware, in the outside world, there was a mountain of people who were jealous of and disliked this stupid human.
Until now, he had been too clean and upright to have anything to catch him on, but because there were many hidden enemies, they might make a fuss over trivial matters, starting from the Scientific Ethics Committee to all sorts of committees.
Even though he rarely appeared in official settings, saying it was annoying, and stayed holed up in his lab refusing to come out when various people tried to call and use him, making him disliked by the old fogeys at the top, it wasn’t a situation where he could just be at ease.
That’s why Seonjung and Seyoon had been making a fuss about getting the consent form as soon as possible, but the person in question was really at peace.
Right now, all Seonwoo was worried about was whether he could raise the child or not.
Because his thoughts were so transparent, Seonjung looked at Seonwoo with a face that said this was giving him a headache.
“Anyway, explain the situation well to the senior and somehow get that consent form. It might be just a formality, but that formality is the most important thing.”
“But… you know.”
“What now?”
“I’ve been thinking really hard for two days.”
“And?”
“The senior says he absolutely has to raise the child, and I want to raise the child directly too, so he told me to think about what I should do… Unless it’s going to trial…”
After saying that much, Seonwoo cut off his words and hesitated, seeming unsure even to himself.
At this behavior unlike Seonwoo, Seonjung kicked Seonwoo’s knee lightly with his foot as if to urge him on, and Seonwoo raised his head timidly, looking at Seonjung and opening his mouth with difficulty.
“So, this is just a what if, a real what if… Maybe, could he be suggesting living together with me?”
At the conclusion he had reached after thinking and thinking for two days, Seonwoo asked in a very small voice, adding once more that it was really just a maybe, while checking Seonjung’s expression, and Seonjung instantly shattered that possibility.
“Are you crazy?”
At his brother’s harsh question, Seonwoo also mumbled softly, as if knowing that it didn’t make much sense.
“No… Just… The thought suddenly occurred to me.”
“Do you think Eungyo sunbae is crazy enough to live with you? He shudders at the thought of you.”
From the time they first met at seventeen, following him around saying “Please give me some sperm,” and then for the past 7 years, whenever he got drunk, he would act up and cause all sorts of embarrassment and shame to him – even Seonwoo had to admit this, so he couldn’t refute his brother’s words.
“…That’s true…”
At that answer that came out with a sigh, Seonjung finally decided to clearly tell his lacking brother the cruel but necessary reality he needed to face.
“You stupid brother, think about it carefully. You said you wanted to raise the child, and the senior said he has to raise the child, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Without even going to trial?”
“Yeah.”
“And he said he can’t write the consent form, so you should figure it out yourself?”
“Yeah.”
As Seonwoo kept nodding and giving affirmative answers, Seonjung calmly explained each point as if teaching a kindergartener.
“What that means is, don’t even dream of going to trial, and if you want to get the consent form, give up on the child and get lost far away. Don’t even think about showing your face in front of the child or the senior.”
Seonjung gave a very simple, definitive answer, but Seonwoo tilted his head as if it didn’t quite register.
“…But that wasn’t the nuance…”
“Do you even know what nuance is?”
Remembering that even 10 years ago when Seonwoo first met Eungyo, he had sparkled his eyes in excitement saying, “Wow~ Eungyo hyung called me airhead!” at Eungyo’s utterance of “airhead,” Seonjung had no doubt that his crazy brother had a very significant problem with language ability.
Seonwoo was a child who had developed only in the sciences and had a huge disability in understanding language and atmosphere.
But Seonwoo’s opinion was a bit different.
“I know that much now. It wasn’t the tone of telling me to leave after having the baby. If he was going to tell me to leave after having the baby, he would have said it outright. Eungyo hyung tells me everything without holding back…”
Certainly… that’s true, Seonjung had to admit.
That person isn’t the type to hold back his words for fear of hurting Seonwoo or to have difficulty saying “get lost” outright.
He’s the type who hates dragging things out and dislikes complexity, so he says everything directly.
Come to think of it, there were quite a few things that bothered him.
The whole process of how the baby was conceived was strange, and when they met after being contacted, he talked as if Seonwoo had an accident with another woman, but it was strange that he went to catch him himself in that situation, and it was strange that he said he would manage this stupid brother directly while going to catch him, and it was strange that someone who hates marriage and children would raise a child.
Moreover, saying he would keep him by his side until a decision was made made even less sense.
If he were in Eungyo sunbae’s position, he would have said not to show his face and just call when a decision was made because he couldn’t stand to see him, but keeping him tied up right next to him was really strange.
Above all, it was a method that didn’t match Eungyo sunbae’s personality at all.
“That’s certainly strange. It’s not like that sunbae’s personality to beat around the bush.”
“So maybe, really just maybe, if hyung is suggesting living with me…”
As Seonwoo spoke like that, still seeming to have lingering hopes, Seonjung mercilessly crushed that expectation.
“No matter how much that’s not sunbae’s style, he absolutely wouldn’t live with you. That’s something that can never, ever happen. Even if the world were to end tomorrow, it’s something that doesn’t make sense. Okay?”
At his brother’s resolute words, cold to the point of cruelty, Seonwoo finally nodded.
“…Okay.”
“Anyway, there’s only one conclusion. Just give up on the child and live your own life. There are many things that could go wrong, but you raising a child itself is an error. Eungyo sunbae seems to be worried that if you raise it, there might be two kids like you, so leave it to sunbae. It will grow up very well and abundantly.”
After Seonjung first said that realistically, it would be better for the child too, he marveled at his own wisdom while Seonwoo mumbled softly.
“But… I really wanted to have Eungyo hyung’s child.”
“Do you want to trade your whole life for one child? In this situation, the only way for you to raise the child is to immediately seek asylum in another country with the child, but then you can never come back to Korea. Can you live without seeing Eungyo sunbae? And in a foreign country at that? Where neither the water nor the rice suits you? And you, who can’t even speak English?”
At that point, Seonwoo lowered his gaze, seeming a bit unsure.
If it meant going abroad, which he hated, and not being able to see Eungyo, it would literally be a living hell, and seeing him looking unsure, Seonjung gently coaxed Seonwoo.
“Try to look at it from a distance, from a distance. Right now, you might have to give up the child and separate, but you’re living under the same sky, and your friend is Eunsoo, so you can’t completely cut ties with the child. You can just live your life, do your work, and see their face occasionally, right? And originally, your goal was Eungyo sunbae, right? You want to have the child because it’s Eungyo sunbae’s child, not because you desperately want a child, right?”
As the anger had already dissipated, Seonjung spoke in the gentlest tone possible to soothe and coax his still childish brother.
At that caring tone, Seonwoo also seemed to waver a bit, lowering his head with a gloomy face.
“That’s true… but I still really want to raise hyung’s child…”
“So, why a child specifically? If you like someone, you date them, you want to be with them.”
Come to think of it, he was curious about that.
After falling for Eungyo at first sight in high school, Seonwoo’s confession wasn’t “I like you” but “Please give me your sperm!”
That was shocking enough, but after that, whenever he drank, he would chase after him asking for sperm, earning him the nickname “Sperm Collector,” and he even suddenly changed his major from rare intractable disease treatment to organ regeneration and artificial organs, saying he would make an artificial womb.
If he really loved someone, he should have thrown away work and study and desperately begged to meet him, but this guy was obsessed with having a child rather than pursuing love itself.
So sometimes, he wondered if this was really about liking that person, or if he just wanted to have a child with that person’s superior genes.
Of course, for a normal person it would be the former, but unfortunately, for this guy, the possibility of the latter couldn’t be ignored.
If not, he couldn’t be this obsessed with a child.
And from such a young age at that.
No matter how lacking his brother was, how deficient in common sense, and how much of a genius living in his own world, thinking that was too strange, Seonjung looked at Seonwoo seriously, and Seonwoo blinked his eyes as if wondering why he was asking such a thing.
“A child is the fruit of love.”
“What…?”
“Mom and Dad said so. That a child is the fruit of love. So while it’s understandable to remove risk factors for the child before conception, receiving donated sperm and eggs or genetically modifying to create a desired child isn’t love. Even if it’s lacking and a bit slow, the fruit of love with the person you love should be accepted as it is.”
Watching Seonwoo spout out word for word what he had been instilled with by his parents since childhood with bright eyes, Seonjung exhaled with a “Huh,” as if perplexed.
“Since it wasn’t going to work out with Eungyo hyung anyway… As you said, hyung, there’s no way he would live with me, so I at least wanted to have a child. Then, a fruit of love would be born.”
At that moment, Seonjung held his forehead, feeling a terrible dizziness that struck his head.
He knew his brother was lacking, but he didn’t know he was this lacking, so the shock was too great.
No matter how deficient he was in language and social aspects, how could he develop such an absurd logic that a child is the fruit of love, so if a child is born, love is achieved?
No, originally, the fruit of love is borne after two people love each other and come together, not “I like you alone, so if I just have a child, the fruit is complete!”
As the family member who had known him the longest, he knew that Seonwoo only understood ‘ah’ when you said ‘ah’ and ‘euk’ when you said ‘euk’, but this was beyond imagination.
To think my brother could be this stupid, Seonjung thought as he looked at Seonwoo, who stared back at him as if wondering what was wrong.
“What?”
“…”
“Do you have something to say?”
At Seonwoo’s face tilting his head, Seonjung decided he should immediately block this guy’s phone number.
And he was thinking he should take a vacation from the hospital and go on a jungle expedition until this matter was settled.
Convinced that he absolutely couldn’t handle this guy, Seonjung gave up on speaking any further and just shook his head.
Then he silently opened his desk drawer and took out a vacation request form.
“Why are you in such a bad mood?”
At Eunhyeok’s question, who had barged into the office well past quitting time, Eungyo, who had just returned to his desk after barely finishing a long meeting that had continued since morning, glanced back at his brother while leaning deeply back in his chair.
“What’s the matter?”
“I was about to leave work when I heard you still hadn’t left. Plus, I heard you’ve been in low spirits all day, so I came to check on you. Did Lee Seonwoo cause trouble again?”
“No. I’m the one about to cause trouble.”
“Why?”
As Eunhyeok asked that, approaching closer, wondering if something had happened again in just one day, Eungyo, sitting in the chair, turned his gaze to look at Eunhyeok and asked.
“Do you have any plans after this?”
“No. I should go home. Aren’t you going?”
“Then have a drink with me.”
“Are you leaving Moji- I mean, Seonwoo alone? Aren’t you going home?”
“I’m not going. Being together is hell.”
“Why… Ah…”
Having already heard his brother’s greatest life concern yesterday morning, Eunhyeok nodded as if he roughly understood.
“Still no reaction?”
“Let’s talk when we get there.”
“I said yesterday too, I don’t want to know the details of my brother’s sex life.”
“You’ll listen even if you don’t want to. I’m about to explode.”
“…Is it that bad?”
At his brother’s harsh tone, which he was hearing for the first time in his life, Eunhyeok looked somewhat surprised, and Eungyo, who had stood up from his seat, grabbed his bag and led the way.
“Let’s go for now.”
Eungyo, who had left the office carrying a bag containing only simple personal belongings and passed through the already empty secretary’s office, was about to head towards the executive-only elevator when the phone in his jacket pocket rang.
At that sound, Eungyo, who had stopped in front of the elevator and taken out his phone, made a strange expression that was neither crying nor laughing.
At that odd face, Eunhyeok, who was about to get into the opening elevator next to him, asked.
“Moji- I mean, Seonwoo?”
“Yeah.”
As he got into the elevator and pressed the call button, Eungyo sighed and started the conversation.
“Yeah.”
“Hello, it’s Seonwoo…”
Even though it was a number he had saved long ago due to the incessant barrage of texts and calls, Seonwoo greeted with “It’s Lee Seonwoo” every time he called.
Knowing that it wasn’t really meant as “It’s me” but as a substitute for “Hello,” Eungyo replied nonchalantly.
“What is it?”
“You’re late… Are you going to be very late today?”
“I’ll be late. How was the hospital?”
“I went well. Everything’s fine.”
“That’s good. Dinner?”
“I ate. Have you eaten, hyung?”
“Not yet.”
“Ah, then should I prepare a meal?”
At that voice, which had been reacting cautiously and passively but suddenly brightened, Eungyo instinctively caught on to Seonwoo’s thoughts.
“If you want to eat a late-night snack, just eat. Don’t be hesitant, if there’s anything you want to eat, ask the housekeeper to make anything. I’ll eat before I come home, so don’t worry about me.”
“Yes… Then, what time will you be coming home?”
“I’ll be late. Why?”
“Ah… It’s nothing. Just… wondering when you’d be coming home…”
At that voice, which seemed to have lost energy and was almost inaudible, he felt his heart waver a bit.
But thinking there was no need to go home early and torture himself again, he steeled his heart and ended the call.
“I’m going to have a drink with my brother before coming home. Go to sleep first.”
“Yes.”
“I’m hanging up.”
“Yes.”
As the call ended and the doors opened simultaneously, Eungyo sighed and stepped out of the elevator first, heading towards the parked car.
Following behind Eungyo, Eunhyeok looked at him strangely.
“Why is your tone like that?”
“Like what?”
“You’re too cold. You’re originally a cold and unaffectionate guy, but you should be a bit nicer. You should treat lacking kids kindly. Especially him, he’s very lacking, isn’t he?”
At those words, Eungyo thought that he might have been treating this guy particularly harshly, but having repeated only savage words like “Do you want to die?” and “Don’t you want to live?” for the past 10 years while showing extreme aversion, it would be strange to suddenly act affectionately now.
Above all, now he was so irritated just by looking at that guy, wanting to touch him, that he couldn’t say anything nice.
“It’s too much to change my usual way of speaking now.”
As Eungyo answered in a cold voice and approached the driver’s seat of the car parked right in front of the elevator, Eunhyeok, walking right beside him, clicked his tongue softly.
“You said you liked him, don’t you find him cute? Don’t you want to baby him and tell him he’s pretty, pretty?”
“Not at all.”
The thought of touching him was too strong rather than babying him, and looking at the airhead just made him want to hit him, so it certainly wasn’t that, Eungyo answered firmly, and Eunhyeok, who was opening the passenger door, turned to look at Eungyo curiously.
“Do you really like him?”
At Eunhyeok’s brief question, Eungyo, who was about to get into the car, paused for a moment.
“If going crazy wanting to touch him to the point of not being able to sleep at night isn’t liking him, then I guess not.”
“Isn’t that just lust?”
“Do you think lust would arise from looking at that guy?”
“…Well, of course… not.”
Even looking at it in the best light, Lee Seonwoo was a million light-years away from sexy, so Eunhyeok definitely thought it wasn’t that.
To feel sexiness towards that guy would be impossible without affection.
But still, thinking it was too cold, Eunhyeok, who had gotten into the passenger seat, let out a small exclamation as if something had occurred to him.
“Ah!”
“What now?”
As Eungyo, who was about to start the engine after fastening his seatbelt, asked indifferently at his brother’s small exclamation-like cry, Eunhyeok snapped his fingers.
“I think I know what it is.”
“What?”
“Our mother.”
“What about mother?”
“The way he takes care of father outside and won’t stand for anyone badmouthing him, but turns into a witch after just three words when sitting with him.”
As Eungyo, who had started the engine and was slowly driving the car towards the parking lot exit after changing gears, firmly closed his mouth at those words. He had been thinking the same thing, so he couldn’t affirm or deny it as he drove the car, and Eunhyeok, sitting in the passenger seat, continued speaking as if finding it amusing.
“How did you end up taking after Mother even in that?”
“I guess the genetic modification worked too well.”
“Me and the others aren’t like that. You’ve taken after Mother too much.”
“…”
“Don’t you think your future might be like Mother’s?”
“Don’t say such horrible things.”
“What you’re doing now is similar to Mother. The way you throw out words, the way you mistreat him, telling me not to call him airhead while you use all sorts of insults yourself. Ah, that reminds me. That time when Mother and Father had an unprecedentedly long fight, Mother got so angry he said she’d bankrupt Father and made a few of our affiliates go insolvent. We wondered why he was acting like that, but he said Father clearly did wrong but wouldn’t apologize no matter what, so he needed to make him come to his senses. And then when Seongjin Tech tried to take advantage of the situation and launch a full-scale attack, Mother completely destroyed Seongjin Tech.”
At a time when Father’s inferiority complex towards Mother had reached its peak, Mother, who was truly furious, had used an extreme measure, saying, “I’ll bankrupt you,” and squeezed the funding of several affiliates, causing them to go insolvent.
Father finally backed down and begged profusely at Mother’s determination to ruin him even if it meant his own ruin, and the situation seemed to calm down, but right at that moment, when a rival company tried to take advantage and attack Father, Mother unleashed a tremendous retaliation behind the scenes and actually bankrupted that company.
It was so strange that when asked what psychology was behind that, Mother had said:
‘Even if I ruin him, I’ll be the one to do it, and even if I curse him, I’ll be the one to do it.’
He didn’t understand the meaning of those words then, but now he thinks he does.
When you like someone so, so much, but their twisted personality causes that love to become distorted, you end up cursing and tormenting them because you’re upset and angry.
But because it’s the person you like, you can’t stand others doing the same.
He understands that now.
This is why marriage was terrifying.
If it were a political marriage, that would be one thing, but if it were a marriage out of love, his pride was so strong that although he would like them, he would get upset at being constantly taken advantage of, and he felt he would end up like his mother, which is why he really hated the idea of marriage.
But even if he hates it, there’s nothing he can do about it.
Once he became aware and started being drawn in, he couldn’t control it.
Throwing away reason and everything else for just one person is definitely his mother’s trait.
“If you look at Mother, you should be able to see your future too, so adjust accordingly. Although the fundamental problem lies with Father, our Mother isn’t exactly easy-going either. Rather than getting tangled up and lashing out in all directions, just be honest. If you’ve acknowledged it, just go with it comfortably. If you keep worrying about pride and superiority in relationships, your future will quickly become like Mother’s.”
As Eunhyeok gave brotherly advice for once, Eungyo, who had parked the car in the underground parking lot of their destination, spoke calmly as he turned off the engine.
“I’ll take your advice to heart. Get out.”
“If you haven’t had dinner, why don’t we eat instead of drinking on an empty stomach?”
“Reason and self-control have become quite troublesome.”
At those words that Eungyo muttered softly as he unfastened his seatbelt and got out of the car, Eunhyeok, who was about to get out of the car, asked again as if he hadn’t heard properly.
“What did you say?”
“…It’s nothing. I need to get a bit drunk to pass out as soon as I get in today. I barely slept yesterday.”
At Eungyo’s words that he would rely on alcohol to sleep, when he usually hardly ever drank, and even when he did, he rarely got drunk and couldn’t stand getting rowdy or passing out from alcohol, Eunhyeok burst out laughing as if finding it amusing.
“Why? Because of sexual frustration?”
“Something like that. Yesterday, that guy was running around naked.”
“Completely naked?”
“Yeah.”
At this unexpected story, Eunhyeok, standing in front of the elevator, made a face as if thinking ‘perhaps’.
“Was that perhaps him trying to seduce you?”
Not knowing the detailed situation, for Eunhyeok, if someone had already had a relationship with a man once and then ran around naked in front of him, especially inside the house, he could only interpret it that way, but for Eungyo, who knew the circumstances, it was literally nonsense.
“That guy isn’t a creature capable of such a high-level idea.”
“Could it be that you didn’t recognize the sign?”
“No. He was just running around naked because he got surprised turning on the air shower while showering.”
Roughly imagining that situation, Eunhyeok muttered softly as if feeling sorry.
“Oh my… You really are having a hard time.”
“I’m going through all the hardships of a lifetime at once.”
“Well, people become stronger through hardship. So let’s drink today. Drink, get drunk, and pass out as soon as you get home. Sometimes that’s better. I’ll take responsibility and see you home today.”
Seeing his brother becoming quite human-like recently, Eunhyeok smiled and patted his shoulder, and Eungyo quietly looked back at Eunhyeok.
“Just don’t pass out first.”
As Eungyo clicked his tongue, looking at his eldest brother who always passed out first among the siblings whenever they drank, making them take him home annoyingly, Eunhyeok assured him as if it wouldn’t happen this time.
“I’ll hold out today. Don’t worry.”
“I’ll believe you.”
Although not very convincing, after answering like that, Eungyo got into the arrived elevator and pressed the button for the top floor.
Although he had planned to drink first in case his brother got drunk and he might wake up while dealing with the aftermath, since the goal today was just to get drunk, unfortunately, once again, it was Eunhyeok who got drunk and passed out first that day.
“Who’s taking responsibility for whom?”
Late past midnight, Eungyo, who had returned home belatedly, entered the foyer with a tired face, loosening his tie.
Until just before arriving at the bar, he had boasted that he absolutely wouldn’t get drunk first today, but in the end, he passed out first just one hour after starting to drink.
It was too annoying to take him home, so he waited for the alcohol to wear off while drinking heavily alone, but even after midnight, he showed no signs of waking up, so he finally took him home and was on his way back, feeling extremely tired.
He had drunk quite a bit, and he was tired from lugging around a full-grown man, much larger than average, so he was about to pass through the living room and go straight to the bedroom when he heard the sound of someone breathing from the living room.
Turning towards the sound in the unusually quiet house with good soundproofing, he saw a lump lying on the sofa.
Seonwoo was sleeping on the sofa, wearing the large, shabby shirt he had on when he was first brought here and quite old-looking training pants.
He had followed the instruction to sleep first, but it was on the sofa rather than the bed…
Looking at him sleeping on the sofa with his face like a pressed rice cake, using a cushion as a pillow, Eungyo first put his bag on the table while loosening his tie.
Then, he grabbed Seonwoo’s shoulder and shook it.
“Lee Seonwoo?”
“…”
“Airhead, wake up.”
“Mmm…”
“Wake up and go sleep in the room.”
“Mm…”
“Lee Seonwoo.”
“Mmm…”
After calling his name one last time and shaking his shoulder, the rice cake just whined but didn’t open his eyes.
“This is driving me crazy…”
Seeing that he wasn’t budging at all, apparently quite exhausted, Eungyo had no choice but to take off his jacket and bend down.
And just as he was about to embrace the guy who had just fallen asleep, his nape touched the tip of Eungyo’s nose.
And that scent, which he had smelled just once, brushed past his nostrils.
It had been just once.
It had been just once, over a month ago, but the memory of that day remained so intensely etched in his mind.
Along with that scent, the clear memory of the touch and weight of his skin, and the feeling of his arms came flooding back, suddenly making his head spin, and as he stood there frozen, slender arms wrapped around his neck.
And as if clinging tightly, the guy who had embraced his neck exhaled a sleepy breath that brushed against his ear.
That breath made his heart tremble.
And soon, his reason, already weakened by alcohol, began to shake uncontrollably.
The shameless thought of whether he could just touch a little, lick a little like this, since he wouldn’t know anyway as he was sleeping, and whether it would be okay to just touch a little, began to boil up.
If he could just suck on his nape a little, just touch his waist and buttocks a bit…
The instinct to just do it right now and the reason saying it’s a crime to touch a sleeping person began to clash and fight fiercely.
Should I just touch him, just a little, just very slightly…
Just as the strong desire was about to cut the string of reason, he heard a small moan from the guy embracing his neck.
“Mm… sleepy…”
At that small whining sound, he barely grasped onto his reason that was about to break and gritted his teeth as he lifted the guy up.
And with superhuman patience, he carried the guy clinging to his neck into the bedroom and carefully laid the sleeping guy down on the bed.
Being careful not to startle him even a little, and worried he might get hurt, he gently laid the guy on the bed and was about to straighten up, but the arms wrapped around his neck wouldn’t let go.
At that moment, he clearly heard the sound of dry swallowing in his throat.
The arms around his neck were tightly wrapped, but since it was in his sleep, he could easily remove them if he tried.
But he didn’t want to remove them.
The sound of breathing by his ear was too sweet, and that skin was too hot, making his heart pound uncontrollably.
His mind, which had remained clear despite drinking so much, suddenly became hazy, and as he stood there unable to remove those arms, holding his breath, the strength in the arms increased.
“Let’s sleep together…”
At that voice and tone that sounded like whining, his throat went completely dry.
Unable to overcome that hot sensation, he lowered his body, pulled by that force, and immediately, the guy’s nape touched his lips.
At the scent of skin brushing his nose and that soft-looking skin, his reason snapped with a ‘pop’.
Yes, I’m drunk.
I’m in a drunken state.
So reason can go take a break for a while.
Humans can’t always live rationally.
People make mistakes, commit faux pas, and lose their minds sometimes.
Although the thing he hated most in this world was making mistakes using alcohol as an excuse, from this moment on, he decided to understand those people.
When you desperately want to do something you can’t do in your right mind, purposely losing your mind can be one way of overcoming it.
He knew it was forced reasoning, but he had no choice but to justify his actions to himself like this.
That’s how seductive the situation was.
Slowly lowering his body to that fatal impulse, stronger than the voice of conscience, he lightly kissed the nape.
As he sucked in that tender skin and lightly licked it, his head spun.
At the same time, his hand instinctively went under Seonwoo’s shirt again, caressing his waist and slowly moving downwards.
His hand, which had traced the skinny waist’s bone structure down to between the buttocks, was now pulling down the loose training pants along with the underwear.
His breathing became faster with each touch of skin as his hand moved.
And along with that, he felt pressure from below.
As he lightly bit the nape, feeling the clothes pressing against his erect penis, the sleeping guy made a small sound.
“Mmm…”
It was just a simple whine.
It was clearly just a sound made in his sleep, perhaps a bit annoyed, but at this moment, it sounded like a moan.
At that small sound, he took his lips off the guy’s nape and lowered his gaze, his penis fully erect and demanding release, and saw the flesh exposed above the pants pulled down to the knees.
Although the crotch was covered by the large top, the thighs exposed above the knees looked even more erotic.
Although they were skinny thighs with no muscle at all, just looking at them seemed to make various parts of his body tingle.
His head was spinning.
His mind, which had remained clear despite drinking so much, was now becoming dizzyingly distorted.
These were the precious legs he couldn’t even touch in yesterday’s dream.
As he slowly reached out his hand to caress the skin of the inner thigh that he had so desperately wanted to touch, his crotch throbbed.
He slowly unbuckled his belt and lowered the zipper at the heat raging inside his body.
At that moment, his erect penis sprang out from between the clothes.
With his cock already as hard as it could be, he leaned over the sleeping guy, supporting his body with both arms on the mattress.
And after sucking on the skin of that nape once more, he lowered his hips and rubbed the tip of his penis against the sleeping guy’s thigh.
No, he didn’t even rub it.
In fact, he just touched it to the thigh.
He had just very lightly touched that soft skin, afraid the guy might wake up, but in that very brief moment, his mind went blank.
It was a very short moment.
After feeling something burst inside his body in an instant, when he came to his senses, white liquid was wetting that guy’s thigh.
It happened so suddenly that at first, he didn’t realize what it was or what had happened.
No, he seemed to know what it was, but he didn’t want to acknowledge it.
But in this all too clear situation, he could no longer deny reality.
No matter how drunk he was, no matter how much he had let go of his reason, his eyes were still clear.
And since his ability to perceive reality had also returned to normal, he couldn’t help but know.
“…Fuck…”
Along with that low curse, Eungyo realized one important fact.
Excessive patience leads to crime and premature ejaculation.
***
