Mr. Dior - Chap 63

The next day, Jiao Qi was awoken by a spray of slightly cool mist on his face. When he opened his eyes, he saw Zhang Chenfei sitting by his side with a serious expression, holding a humidifier and directing the mist that came out from it at his face.

“What are you doing?” Jiao Qi asked, raising a hand to shield his face. Zhang Chenfei caught hold of him, pressed him back down, then misted his arm all over, from his shoulders all the way to his fingertips.

“Baby, you’re dehydrating. If I don’t spray you with water, you’ll turn into a dried fish snack,” Zhang Chenfei said, looking at the slightly dry skin on his other arm.

“That’s because you put too much bath salts in the water yesterday,” Jiao Qi said, smacking aside his hand and sitting up.

“This won’t do. You’ll sleep in the water tonight,” Zhang Chenfei said, looking at the warm, soft mattress with dissatisfaction. He got up and poured a cup of warm water for his little wife and urged him to drink it quickly. “It’s too dry. It won’t be beneficial for egg production.”

“… …” Jiao Qi drank a mouthful of water with a bland expression. “Who’s producing eggs? Me?” he asked.

Poseidon smiled slightly, then shook his head. He stretched out a finger with a well-defined bone structure, then tapped his own nose. “Me,” he said.

“Pfft–” Jiao Qi spat out the mouthful of water he’d just drank, moistening the great egg-producing Poseidon’s face. “You… aren’t you a male?”

Zhang Chenfei wiped his face and looked helplessly at his little wife. The merman prince had lost his memories, and it seemed that he had forgotten even the most basic things about life in the ocean. “According to the way humans have classified marine life, gods of the sea are all considered female, darling. They can reproduce asexually, or choose to have offspring with their partner,” he explained patiently.

“… …” This fellow wasn’t thinking of becoming the shou, was he?! Jiao Qi looked his Laogong up and down. The soft silk bathrobe showed off the graceful lines of his excellent physique. His legs were long, his waist was narrow, and his whole body looked taut and muscular. Hmm… actually, he wasn’t totally opposed to the idea…

With his head filled with thoughts of egg production, Jiao Qi couldn’t decide what to eat for breakfast. He finally managed to collect himself just as the car stopped in front of Bajiao’s office building. The Maybach stopped in front of the revolving doors in breach of the building’s rules, as usual, and the employees who were about to walk into the building halted, preparing to greet their CEO who was about to get off the car.

Zhang Chenfei quickly got out of the car and opened the door for his little wife. He unfastened the seatbelt, then picked him up in his arms without a single thought.

“Good morning, CE…” the stunned employees all took a few steps back in unison and got smacked in the head by the revolving door.

“Put me down!” Jiao Qi exclaimed, smacking urgently at Zhang Chenfei’s arm. “You promised yesterday – you’d let me walk around outside on my own.”

“This isn’t considered “outside”. We’re “inside” right now,” Zhang Chenfei said, raising his chin at their surroundings, signalling to his little wife to look around. He’d passed through the revolving door and was already “inside” Bajiao Inc.’s office.

Yu Yuan happened to walk in right at this time. He’d witnessed the whole scene earlier and scooted up to them curiously. “Did the CEO sprain his ankle?” he asked, beckoning one of the security guards to bring a wheelchair over.

It was less embarrassing to say that this entire fiasco was due to a sprained ankle than to explain what the real reason was, so Jiao Qi didn’t correct Yu Yuan. The veins on his forehead continued to stand out, however.

After setting his little wife down on the wheelchair, Zhang Chenfei was finally able to set his heart at ease somewhat. He really didn’t have the heart to watch his little merman walk; every step was like a knife to his heart, reminding him what the dire consequences of his little joke had been.

“I’ll take it from here, CEO Zhang,” Yu Yuan said, pushing the wheelchair and smiling at Zhang Chenfei.

Now that Jiao Qi had managed to free himself from the God Poseidon who kept wanting to carry him here and there, he tossed aside the wheelchair and stood up the moment the lift doors closed. His secretary watched in surprise as CEO Jiao walked into his office with a cold expression on his face. Before he could sit down on his chair, however, a certain someone burst into his office.

“Now what?” Jiao Qi asked in exasperation. He had no energy to argue, and just let Big Cock Zhang hug him from behind, waving a hand to dismiss Yu Yuan, who was covering his eyes with his hand. He turned to his husband, intending to have a good long talk with him. “You can’t keep behaving this way! People will notice that something is off with you if you keep doing things like this.”

“It’s just – I suddenly remembered that I forgot to say something to you,” Zhang Chenfei said anxiously.

“What?”

“I love you.”

“… …” Jiao Qi stared blankly at him for a few seconds, then his head dipped. He felt rather bad towards Zhang Chenfei now, and the annoyance he felt earlier had completely dissipated. “You really are… why are you suddenly saying this now?”

“This is something that should be said everyday,” the great God Poseidon said, cradling Jiao Qi’s face in his hands. He gave him a kiss, one that communicated just how much he treasured his little wife, then turned to leave with a light heart.

Were all marine creatures this sentimental? Jiao Qi felt very confused as he sat down in front of his work desk, and his thoughts couldn’t help straying to the issue of egg production again.

Because he was a little lazier on this front, and the fact that he was physically weaker than Zhang Chenfei, Jiao Qi was used to being the bottom in their relationship. He actually had no experience being a top at all. Jiao Qi felt like he had to be a responsible husband, and so when he was done with official matters, he started researching this topic in earnest.

They had all the various props that were used by tops and the other disposable items required for the deed at home, and as to the process, it was just a question of flipping around what he had experienced so far. This didn’t seem too difficult, so he went on to research the mating habits of marine creatures.

Most fish species had their eggs fertilized outside their body. A small percentage of them, like sharks, had their eggs fertilized in vivo. Some species like the seahorse had unique methods of fertilisation; the females put their eggs into the males’ reproductive pouch and were fertilized in the male’s body. The male was also the one who gave birth to the baby seahorses.

“… …”

What species was Poseidon? Surely he wasn’t a seahorse.

As Jiao Qi was ruminating on what species his husband was, a call came in from Mr Jiao Zuoren, who was currently experiencing a sudden wave of popularity.

“I’m not going for tomorrow night’s charity dinner. You’ll go as the representative of Jiaoyang Real Estate,” Daddy Jiao said in a tone that brooked no opposition.

“Why aren’t you going?” Jiao Qi asked, surprised. He’d heard that Li Yingjun’s dad was going to auction off a box of limited edition cigars that couldn’t be purchased anywhere on the market anymore, and Daddy Jiao had been excitedly talking about bidding for this item earlier.

“Remember to get those cigars at the auction,” Daddy Jiao said, refusing to answer his question.

“Sure,” Jiao Qi said. He didn’t ask any more questions and just agreed. He figured that the reason was probably because his mother didn’t want to go; these charity dinners were often used by young female celebrities as a beauty battleground. Without a partner, Jiao Zuoren would become hot property as these young celebrities’ partner on the red carpet, firstly because he was very popular thanks to the “lady comrade” comment, and secondly because he had a good reputation, and nasty rumours were unlikely to spread if they had him as their partner.

Daddy Jiao had probably had enough of these young ladies’ machinations and harassment, and had thus decided to just not attend the event at all.

If it wasn’t for his father’s reminder, Jiao Qi would have completely forgotten about the dinner. This dinner was sponsored by a few tech companies, and Zhang Chenfei absolutely had to attend. Jiao Qi rubbed his throbbing temples and made a call to Shifei’s secretary to run over the draft of Zhang Chenfei’s speech, just in case he decided to add in things about “the Great Country of Atlantis” or stuff like that.

When Jiao Qi got home, the first thing he saw when he opened the door was thick mists swirling out of the entrance.

“Woof!”

A huge humidifier that looked like a tree stood right in the centre of their living room. The leaves spread verdantly all over the ceiling, and every single branch exuded mist from its end. Guangzong circled the tree a few times in high spirits, found a good spot, then lifted a hind leg.

“Guangzong!” Jiao Qi immediately shouted to stop the puppy from peeing in the house.

“Don’t worry about it,” Zhang Chenfei said, taking off his jacket. He gathered his little wife into his arms. “I’ve made some modifications to the house to ensure that you won’t dehydrate. Want to go and see our sleeping quarters?”

“What did you do?”

Surely this fellow hadn’t turned the bed into a massive tub?! This house only had one bedroom, and if he turned the whole bed into a tub, then they wouldn’t have anywhere to sleep tonight.

The great Poseidon smiled enigmatically, then picked up his little merman and slung him over one shoulder. His delicate little merman prince had to sleep on the softest waters. He kicked open the door to the bedroom and tossed his little merman onto the new bed.

Jiao Qi held his breath and made ready to swim. He had “swum” two strokes when he realized that he was actually lying on something solid. The thing under him was soft and slightly cool. The great God Poseidon’s “waters” were a round, three-meter wide… water bed.

“Baby, do you want to have little fish with Poseidon?” Zhang Chenfei asked, hugging his little wife from behind.

“Right now?” Jiao Qi asked, taking a deep breath and silently preparing himself for his role as a gong. He ran through the instructions in his head, then turned to look at Zhang Chenfei confidently.

The great Poseidon gave a low chuckle and undid the little prince’s shirt buttons. “Don’t be afraid. It won’t hurt. I will send my little fish gently into your body, and if you don’t want to get pregnant, you just need to wash it out later,” he said.

“Wait,” Jiao Qi said, frowning. This didn’t sound quite right. “Are you a seahorse?”

“No. Strictly speaking, the gods of the sea don’t belong to any known marine species. If you really insist on classifying me…” Lord Poseidon thought seriously for a moment. “I suppose you could say I’m a sea dog.”

“… were you a husky when you were little?”

“How did you know?”