Mr. Melancholy Wants to Live a Peaceful Life - Chap 12

You Zhengping had been in a good mood the last few days. Every day he’d come to work humming a tune. In the intervals between observing Zhen Li, he didn’t forget to use a successful personage’s expression to look down upon Cen Xiao and the others.

“Cen-ge, what’s going on with our idiot boss lately?” Shi Yongfu asked uncomprehendingly.

“Idiot boss” was a private pet name for You Zhengping. They called him “boss” to his face and “idiot boss” behind his back. This demonstrated everyone’s love and esteem for You Zhengping. A leader who didn’t get roasted by his subordinates wasn’t a good leader; a boss who wasn’t secretly called out by his underlings wasn’t a good boss.

Cen Xiao, the squad’s second-in-command deputy captain, as well as the person who upheld the squad’s spirit, raised his eyebrows and said impatiently, “What else could it be? When he’s fighting with Yu Hua, he smashes desks. Now that they’ve made it up, he’s winning at life. Look at the way his expression is always full of sympathy for us single dogs. It really makes you mad.”

“He’s coming, he’s coming! What do we do?” Shi Yongfu said quietly.

Unflappably, Cen Xiao said, “No matter what he says, we won’t ask how his relationship with Yu Hua is going. Don’t give him the opportunity to show off. Frustrate him!”

The underlings exchanged looks, silently relaying messages.

You Zhengping came over carrying a big box of food. He put it on the desk and opened it, revealing the secret recipe roast chicken legs prepared inside. He said radiantly, “Yu Hua thought I was working too hard after he found out I’d become an auxiliary policemen, so he prepared snacks for me. What delicious chicken legs! Though he made a little too much. What should I do if I can’t eat them all?”

Cen Xiao snapped his fingers. “That really is pretty worrying. But it’s all right, we have to share in your troubles. Brothers, forward!”

A crowd of underlings swarmed forward, snatching all the chicken legs away. You Zhengping had only been showing off. He hadn’t really been planning on sharing the food Yu Hua had lovingly made with his bad friends. As soon as he saw the chicken legs being snatched away, he advanced to protect them, but it was hard to take on a crowd with two fists, and You Zhengping only managed to rescue two.

“You guys…”

You Zhengping raised his hands, each with a chicken leg in it, and was about to lose his temper when Shi Yongfu came over and bit one of the chicken legs in his hands. He licked it with his tongue and said, “You’re not going to eat this, are you?”

You Zhengping gaped at Shi Yongfu using the most shameless method to steal the chicken leg he was protecting. Now that it had been bitten like this, he couldn’t eat it. He could only let it be snatched by Shi Yongfu.

He was worried that the last one would also be snatched, quickly bit off a piece, and began to eat along with his teammates as though venting his anger.

These young men were very active, had big appetites, and ate quickly. A dozen chicken legs were finished off in less than five minutes, leaving You Zhengping staring blankly at an empty box.

When Yu Hua had given him the box of food, he had said that You Zhengping definitely wouldn’t be able to finish it and had wanted him to share with his colleagues. You Zhengping had been thinking of giving each person a half, leaving the rest for himself. But these people had snatched away two chicken legs each!

“Burp!” Cen Xiao belched, pulled out a wet wipe, and wiped his mouth. “Thank Yu-ge for me.”

Even the wipe had been put in the bag by Yu Hua. He knew that these young men had bad living habits and had worried that they would wipe their mouths with their sleeves, so he had made You Zhengping bring along sanitizing wipes.

You Zhengping didn’t know whether other people’s marriages were happy; his marriage was absolutely happy.

Yu Hua took much too good care of You Zhengping. Cen Xiao and the others sometimes couldn’t resist being envious.

You had to be indulgent after eating someone’s food. Having eaten the snacks prepared by Yu Hua, Cen Xiao decided that on account of the chicken legs, he would give You Zhengping an opportunity to brag. He said, “Fine, I’ll give you ten minutes to talk about your recent martial relations. We’ll…undertake the insurmountably difficult job of listening.”

You Zhengping’s character was dynamic; he was quick to anger and also quick to cool down.

Seeing his underlings were finally willing to listen to him describe his happy life, You Zhengping quickly wiped his mouth, straightened his clothes, then complacently told them what had happened after the mirror was fixed.

That day, taking the mirror being fixed as an opportunity, he had launched an attack, comforting Yu Hua over losing his job. He told Yu Hua that the city public security bureau had recently raised the auxiliary police’s salaries to the standard for public institutions. While his current salary didn’t match up to that of a civil servant, it was still a lot higher than the previous 2500. The base salary combined with the living subsidy was still over four thousand after withholding for the five insurances and one fund1.

This salary didn’t sound high, but he also had merit pay and could earn more the more he worked. As long as he was diligent and willing, there would be no problem paying the mortgage. He told Yu Hua not to worry and to take his time looking for work, not to take a job that didn’t suit him for the sake of money.

“Also, now that I’m an auxiliary police officer, the police station has given me a police-issued motor scooter. I won’t need to drive the car anymore, so I can also save on gas. Our car uses too much gas,” You Zhengping said economically.

Actually, the merit pay for one year wasn’t high at all. Even if it could just about cover the mortgage, it still wouldn’t be enough to live on. But You Zhengping didn’t really need to rely on his salary to support Yu Hua. He just needed to introduce the concepts of merit pay, bonuses, and so on, then slowly bring home those millions of his in secret. He really was clever to think of such a method!

As You Zhengping inwardly praised himself, Yu Hua, sitting beside him, hugged his husband.

Yu Hua held You Zhengping’s hands. These weren’t soft hands. There were quite a few callouses on them, and the palms were rough. There were also cigarette burns all over the right hand.

“This…um.” Seeing Yu Hua staring at the wounds Zhen Li had made on his hand, You Zhengping quickly covered up by saying, “This…was an accident. Last night, while I was carrying out my assignment, there was a drunkard using a cigarette end to burn himself, and I blocked him a few times… It’s all right, the wounds aren’t serious, they’ll heal quickly.”

For You Zhengping, these were small injuries. When he had done live combat games at the base before, he had once carelessly walked into a trap and gotten half his body blown up by a landmine. If he hadn’t opened a space in time to weaken the force of the explosion, he would have died on the spot.

You Zhengping’s spaces could weaken the force of attacks to less than one tenth, but this wasn’t an innate ability; it had been slowly acquired through training.

At the beginning, there had been no way for his spaces to suppress an opponent. During practice, when You Zhengping used a space to trap Director Xiao, Director Xiao could tear open the space and escape. To increase the spaces’ defensive power, You Zhengping had undergone countless attacks, gotten blown up countless times, regularly faced the attacks of heavy firepower head on with the spaces.

The defensive power of his spaces had gradually been refined. Those days had been bitter. But everyone had told You Zhengping, Your ability is very strong. Your power can protect countless teammates and ordinary people, as well as your family. To better protect all these people from the Destroyers, you have to become stronger. You have to become undefeatable.

You Zhengping had been only ten years old then. He hadn’t understood much of the general principle. He had only known that if he became strong, he could go home.

Sometimes when he had been injured, he would furtively wipe away tears in the infirmary, unwilling to cry in front of the boys in his grade.

You Zhengping wasn’t afraid of pain or suffering because he’d known from a young age that tears were useless. He had left his parents too young. However much the leaders valued him and looked after him, they still couldn’t be as perfectly considerate as parents. So he had totteringly grown up with the mutual support of his little companions. Around eighteen-nineteen years old, he had had psychological problems.

That was his first time seeing his parents after becoming an adult. His mother had cried while she hugged him, saying her child had grown up.

You Zhengping had been extremely excited. He’d wanted to hug his mother back, but he’d found his arms suddenly wrapped in his space. His special ability had started going out of control.

He had immediately pushed his mother away and charged out the door of their home, running madly all the way to an empty suburb. His frenzied special ability had started madly cutting into the space around him, stopping only when his energy had been used up.

Since then, You Zhengping had started using extreme sports to control his emotions. He had to completely control his ability. He couldn’t let it hurt his family.

And because of this, You Zhengping had lost his only opportunity after growing up to have someone cherish him.

“Tender affection” had been deleted from You Zhengping’s dictionary.

But now, Yu Hua was holding You Zhengping’s hand, tender kisses falling on the injured back of his hand. Yu Hua looked deeply at You Zhengping. “Does it hurt a lot?”

“No, no, it doesn’t hurt!” You Zhengping said in a flurry. “It’s just a small injury.”

“It’s because I’m useless,” Yu Hua said miserably. “I made you worry because I lost my job, made you go do such dangerous work.”

Yu Hua stroked You Zhengping’s burns with the pads of his fingers. He knew that cigarettes were addictive, that they were bad for a person’s health, that they polluted the environment. Cigarette ends weren’t very hot; they couldn’t even burn through glass. You Zhengping’s constitution was so weak that even a little cigarette could burn him like this.

So small and weak a life, struggling to open his arms, wanting to hold up a part of the sky for Yu Hua, so he could take his time looking for work without having to worry about the stress of living and household expenses.

Yu Hua had worked with countless people, and he had had quite a few companions…or rather, subordinates. Everyone had depended on him, obeyed him. He had been everyone’s backbone, undertaking stress that it would be hard for the average person to bear.

Yu Hua had lived alongside stress and responsibility. He had never felt that it was very hard.

But now, You Zhengping wanted to protect him, make it so Yu Hua didn’t have to worry, because You Zhengping was taking care of everything.

He wanted to use this body that was so fragile that even a cigarette could burn it to protect him; this was so touching.

Yu Hua kissed each wound on You Zhengping’s hand, then gently touched the center of his husband’s brow. In a low, hoarse voice, he said, “I haven’t taken good care of you.”

“Hey, it’s really all right, what did I tell to you?” His first time being cared for so tenderly, You Zhengping panicked. He wanted to comfort Yu Hua but didn’t know what to say, and he was afraid that his emotions were too agitated and his special ability would go out of control.

There seemed to be a calming force about Yu Hua. During the awkwardness of their first meeting, the happiness of their courtship, and the agitation now, while You Zhengping’s emotions fluctuated, his special ability remained calm from beginning to end.

As long as he was beside Yu Hua, You Zhengping’s abilities wouldn’t go out of control.

Next, You Zhengping could only say, “I, I’ll be as careful as I can after this. I won’t make you worry.”

“Yes,” Yu Hua agreed quietly, arms encircling You Zhengping’s waist.

Then…

“Yu Hua’s back is very strong. I think he’s stronger now than when he was working. Maybe he’s been resting up? Hehehe…” You Zhengping said to his companions, remembering or possibly reliving.

“Enough, enough!” Cen Xiao slapped You Zhengping in the face. “I only gave you ten minutes, and it’s been half an hour, shut up!”

The rest of them were single. None of them had even dated. They couldn’t take such a racy subject.

Resisting the urge to beat up You Zhengping, who was publicly flaunting his affections, Cen Xiao said, “Get back to business. Zhen Li has been acting strange these past few days.”

You Zhengping calmed down as soon as the Protectors’ work was mentioned. Frowning, he said, “I keep thinking there’s a plan behind Zhen Li’s actions.”

Earlier, You Zhengping’s so-called auxiliary police work had been to sit on his motor scooter and patrol the Xuyang District, tailing and keeping watch on Zhen Li along with some teammates, monitoring his actions.

Then they had found that there was no need at all to tail Zhen Li. He dressed too flashily and was excessively good-looking. There were always people stealthily taking pictures and posting them online.

Before he’d been caught by You Zhengping, the video of Zhen Li shooting hoops had spread all over the internet.

After coming back from the base, the video of him eating malatang at the mall while dressed in red ancient costume had also become popular. The picture of the beautiful man in ancient dress crying because the malatang he was eating was too spicy had been turned into a weight loss meme by the netizens. In the meme, Zhen Li was gently wiping his tears; the writing under it was: I’m already crying, how could you make me eat more?

On the third day, Zhen Li went back to school and conscientiously attended class, conscientiously submitted a request to suspend his schooling, conscientiously prepared materials for registering a studio.

On the fourth day, Zhen Li was photographed wearing formalwear while registering and once again became popular.

On the fifth day, Zhen Li rented a single room in an office building for an extremely low price from a landlord who liked his face.

On the sixth day, Zhen Li began recruiting on all the major websites. He didn’t say what work the studio did, only told people to come interview.

On the seventh day, the Xuyang District’s Protector squad gathered in a certain secret room, put in order the materials concerning Zhen Li’s activities these recent days, and, after eating Yu Hua’s secret recipe roast chicken legs, prepared for a collective discussion.

“I think he’s using this method to look for someone,” You Zhengping said acutely, having broken free of his love-addled mind. “The eye-catching outfits, eye-catching behavior, publicly recruiting on all the major websites… He’s trying to lure someone out into the open.”

Cen Xiao recalled Zhen Li’s performance during the interrogation and doubtfully said, “Does he have the intelligence for that?”

“He definitely doesn’t,” You Zhengping said categorically, “but the person behind him does. Didn’t he say? There’s someone hidden in the shadows, forcing him to deal with another big boss.”

“But we’ve been observing his communication records, his phone app usage, and everyone he’s come into contact with recently. We’ve even investigated the people who posted videos of him online. Nothing came up. If there really is someone plotting behind him, how do they contact him?” Cen Xiao asked.

“Don’t forget, he kept on saying there was an app on his phone, but we couldn’t see it at all. This isn’t something our existing technology can monitor. We can only hypothesize that there’s someone behind him who can use a means of communication that we can’t observe,” You Zhengping said. “In our battle with the Destroyers, we’re always learning by trial and error. There are some things we can simply assume. We can’t insist on evidence.”

“That’s reasonable.” Cen Xiao had been convinced by You Zhengping. He straightened out the materials and filed them, sending them to Director Xiao through the internal network.

Director Xiao responded: “Investigate all the personnel the studio hires. Quietly watch for changes.”

So everyone got busy, closely watching each person who went to Zhen Li’s studio to interview.

Until the ninth day, when Yu Hua brought his resume and was hired by Zhen Li.

You Zhengping: “…”

Author’s Note
Yu Hua: After absorbing Zhen Li’s System, I can control my power and get close to my husband again. I’m in a very good mood!

The System: I’m drying up…

Translator’s Note

1五险一金 – amount withheld from wages by employers to put aside for five insurances (endowment, medical, unemployment, work injury, and maternity) and a housing fund.