Silent Lover (The Silent Concubine) - Chap 145
Chapter 145 – Letting Go
Shen Yu remained silent. Shen Ruofei, thinking he had submitted to her authority, smiled smugly. A servant is still a servant, she thought. Even if fortune allowed him to stay by the Emperor’s side, he would always remain a coward…
In reality, Shen Yu was contemplating something else. He genuinely wanted to leave the palace—not because Shen Ruofei had scared him, but because being with Jun Xuanxiao day and night was terrifying. Even if Jun Xuanxiao became the emperor, he would still be a tyrant!
Shen Yu had no desire to stay by a tyrant’s side…
“That’s right,” Shen Ruofei chuckled. “People are naturally divided into ranks. Some will always remain lowly servants. It’s good that you understand this. With my name, you’ve enjoyed the Emperor’s favor for some time, which is enough. What doesn’t belong to you will never be yours. Some wild dreams should be abandoned… You’re not worthy.”
Shen Ruofei saw Shen Yu lowering his head and assumed he was too humiliated to look up.
“Don’t worry, since you understand your place, I won’t treat you poorly,” she continued, her tone softening. “Once you leave the Emperor’s side, you won’t have to be a lowly servant in the Shen household anymore. I’ll arrange a place for you outside the palace. You’ll have enough to eat and wear, and you can live out your remaining days peacefully.”
Shen Yu finally reacted. If he still had any lingering desires, it was to have a house and some land to live quietly with his mother. Though his mother had passed, it was still his lifelong wish.
Coincidentally, that was exactly what Shen Ruofei had in mind…
“Do you agree?” she asked.
Shen Yu was just about to nod when Jun Xuanxiao strode into the sleeping quarters. Seeing Shen Ruofei, a hint of displeasure crossed his face…
“What are you doing here?” Jun Xuanxiao demanded.
He knew Shen Ruofei was scheming, but didn’t believe she’d dare harm Shen Yu. Nonetheless, he didn’t want Yu’er to interact with someone so manipulative.
“My lord, I noticed Shen Yu was feeling a bit lonely, so I came to chat with him,” Shen Ruofei said sweetly. “After all, we’ve known each other since childhood. We were just reminiscing about old times.”
“Yu’er, is that true?” Jun Xuanxiao asked, his suspicious gaze landing on Shen Yu, waiting for his confirmation.
The moment Jun Xuanxiao entered, Shen Yu felt on guard. His terrifying aura seemed to make the air around him thick. Shen Yu hadn’t even heard his question.
Jun Xuanxiao, though accustomed to Shen Yu avoiding him, couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness…
“So, what were you two talking about?” Jun Xuanxiao pressed.
Shen Ruofei quickly replied, “We were discussing how he grew up in a deep, secluded household and always longed for a free, peaceful home—unlike the palace, which feels like a cage to him. Isn’t that right, Shen Yu?”
Jun Xuanxiao was doubtful, but it did sound like Shen Yu’s true wish…
“Yu’er, do you want to leave the palace?” Jun Xuanxiao asked slowly, emphasizing each word.
Shen Yu nodded vigorously. Outside the palace, there were no cruel people, and he wouldn’t have to live in constant fear…
A flicker of pain crossed Jun Xuanxiao’s eyes.
Did Shen Yu still want to leave him?
Jun Xuanxiao knew he wasn’t a good husband. Despite all the changes he had made—treating Shen Yu gently, refraining from hurting or forcing him—he had cherished him, held him like a treasure. Yet, in the end, Shen Yu still wanted to leave him…
“Is it… is it because I haven’t done enough? Yu’er, tell me, and I’ll change.”
Jun Xuanxiao’s eyes reddened. He had already experienced losing Shen Yu once, and the pain had cut deep. He couldn’t bear to endure it a second time.
Everything he had done was to win back Shen Yu’s heart. Even though Shen Yu barely spoke to him anymore, he had waited patiently. Even if Shen Yu’s heart had turned to stone, he was determined to warm it.
Heaven knows how much Jun Xuanxiao had changed. Once so brash and self-centered, he had smoothed out his rough edges for Shen Yu…
“My lord, don’t force him,” Shen Ruofei interjected. “He’s afraid of you. Even if he says otherwise, it’s only out of fear. My lord, if you truly care for someone, it’s not about imprisoning them by your side, but about letting them go. I know it’s hard for you, but it’s not as if you’ll never see him again. When you miss him, you can visit him outside the palace. Right now, he needs peace and a place to heal.”
Should he imprison him, or set him free? Jun Xuanxiao was torn, unable to decide.
“Yu’er, if I don’t let you go, will you hate me? Will you resent me for the rest of your life?”
Jun Xuanxiao grasped Shen Yu’s hand, and a hot tear fell on Shen Yu’s hand. It burned like fire, making Shen Yu’s heart ache, as if something inside him was breaking free, as if an overwhelming wave of emotion was about to crash through.
A cruel person shouldn’t cry, should they? Why was Jun Xuanxiao crying?
Shen Yu wanted to wipe away his tears, but fear held him back…
Jun Xuanxiao had only cried three times in his life, all because of Shen Yu.
The first time was when Shen Yu took poison, a heart-wrenching pain of life and death. The second time was upon learning of Shen Yu’s birthday, a moment of deep remorse and pity. This time, it was the pain of letting go, the love he was about to relinquish.
“Fine, Yu’er, I’ll set you free.”
Jun Xuanxiao released Shen Yu’s hand and turned away. Making this decision had been agonizing, and he feared that if he looked at Shen Yu any longer, he would change his mind.
The only one pleased with this outcome was Shen Ruofei. Once Shen Yu left the palace and could no longer be with the Emperor day and night, she was confident that the Emperor would eventually forget him, and she could seize the chance to become his one and only favored consort.
