Tit For Tat (Beloved Enemy) - Chap 67

Beloved Enemy Chapter 67
FEBRUARY 9, 2019 ~ ROSYSPELL
GuQingPei rubbed his face, looking tiredly at YuanLiJiang, his voice lowered, “Chairman Yuan, I need some time, I’ll handle this well.”

YuanLiJiang was silent for a long time before he stood up and walked toward the door. With his hand on the door handle, his body paused and his voice somber, “The time you have is not as much as you think. You make the best of it.”

YuanLiJiang opened the door and walked out. GuQingPei heard YuanYang’s hurried footsteps rushing to him. He turned to look at him, seeing his panic and worried expression, thinking in his heart, (he is) still a child.

He had really become more immature as he aged(T/N). For a child, he threw away his brilliant future that he had painstakingly planned out for himself. To find another path, how easy would it be?

T/N: This is saying that he has gone backward in his life as he got older. Instead of being with someone his age who is more mature and think like he does, he is with YuanYang, whom is just like a young child.

GuQingPei can’t help but ask himself, Is this worth it? Where is the worth?

YuanYang came over, “What did my dad say to you?”

GuQingPei looked at him expressionlessly, “Think with your brain, what do you think he will say.”

YuanYang opened his mouth but couldn’t say anything.

“You already knew but didn’t tell me…letting this caught me by surprise, do you think this is fun?”

YuanYang slightly lowered his head.

“How did Chairman Yuan find out?” GuQingPei felt like a machine, saying things without thinking. Every word he spoke came from his subconscious mind.

“He… saw our text messages.” When YuanYang thought of himself concealing something else that was even more detrimental from GuQingPei, he felt his neck weighing a ton, making it excruciatingly difficult for him to lift his head.

GuQingPei nodded and dejectedly look at the bookshelf in front of him, “Go back to your own home. I want to be alone tonight.”

YuanYang instantly grabbed his hand, his voice trembling, “Don’t think of separating from me.”

GuQingPei moved his gaze to him and forcefully smiled, “YuanYang, there is nothing to think about. I’ll have to resign after the year ends. We will be separated anyway.”

“You know what I mean by separation.” YuanYang tightly clutched his arm, “I know my dad won’t agree, but I…”

GuQingPei removed his hand and made a stop gesture. He looked at YuanYang and coarsely muttered, “YuanYang, aren’t we just fuck buddies? Why bother to go against Chairman Yuan? Actually, what happened today would have happened sooner or later. Whether it happened earlier or later, it’s all going to be the same.”

YuanYang instantly felt a stabbing pain in his heart, “So you must be very happy? That you can finally dump me?”

GuQingPei closed his eyes, “I’m not dumping you. It’s just time for us to end this.”

He had always been a selfish person. How could he offend YuanLiJiang for someone that is just a fuck buddy? He can’t afford to offend him. His career, his status, and everything that he had worked hard for in Beijing for more than ten years might not amount to anything in YuanLiJiang’s eyes, but it is everything to him. Why should he take this risk for YuanYang? Who the heck is YuanYang? Why would he do something so stupid?

What’s more, didn’t YuanYang just consider him to be his fuck buddy?

YuanYang gritted his teeth, “End this? GuQingPei, you’ve been looking forward to this day? Right?”

“I haven’t,” GuQingPei’s eyes wandered aimlessly; his mind blank. He didn’t know what he is talking about.

“My dad certainly won’t agree but as long as you say it, I don’t care whether he agrees or not. It’s my life. I will choose who I want to be with. You … you just fucking say it.”

“Say what?”

“Say…, “ YuanYang’s lips trembled, “Say that you like me.”

GuQingPei’s eyes finally focused. He looked directly at YuanYang and muttered, “What fucking right do you have to ask me to say that? What right? What about you? Do you really like me? Are you actually just messing with me because you find this refreshing or do you really have me in your heart? You’re a fool; when it really comes to the crucial point, you can’t even say a word of truth. You think you deserve me to like you!?”

YuanYang immediately hugged him tightly and raggedly shouted, “I fucking like … like you! I’m not crazy! I really care for you. I even insist on staying in your home even though you are a man. If all this is not liking you, then I must really be insane.”

GuQingPei only felt a knife being twisted in his heart; the rim of his eyes painfully ached. He was on the verge of shedding tears.

YuanYang threw all caution out of the wind, risking it all as he continued to voice, “I just like you. I never intended to be separated from you. You also don’t think about separating from me…let alone find others. You can only be with me in this life, all others, don’t even think about it.”

GuQingPei wanted to cry and laugh, “You’re really insane, very insane.” He stretched his hand out to hug YuanYang’s waist.

YuanYang is choking with sobs, “Do you like me? Say something.”

GuQingPei touched his head and whispered, “A bit… A LOT.”

YuanYang’s body trembled. He hugged GuQingPei tighter, almost breaking his waist, making it hard for him to even breathe. But at the same time, he felt that this kind of tightened pressure is full of security.

He (GuQingPei) is really getting more immature as he aged; having past the age of 30, yet still going around getting himself involved with a little boy. In the end, he came to realize that he had fell behind his own standards….it’s like he’s fallen in love.

He couldn’t clearly say when he started to fall for YuanYang. It was not a good time but more of a bad start.

The saddest thing is that when YuanYang is by his side, he was often upset because of YuanYang’s immaturity. But when it really came down to the moment when he is forced to break up with him (YuanYang), he’s a thousand, a million times unwilling to let go.

How is he going to walk out this door? How is he going to end this holiday vacation? How is he going to end this relationship? He longed for time to stop in this moment because he didn’t want to take another step forward. In the foreseeable future, the road is only going to become more and more uncertain and more and more bumpy. Not to mention, his persistence in going forward might not necessarily be cost-effective.

For the first time, GuQingPei is at a complete loss. Reason tells him that he should completely cut himself off from YuanYang. Otherwise, his loss will be immense, but he…

YuanYang sniffed his nose and let go of GuQingPei; YuanYang’s face is full of complicated emotions, “You can’t break up with me. My dad’s side, I’ll take care of it. I won’t let you suffer.”

GuQingPei softly caressed his hair, “YuanYang, don’t think that things are so simple. It doesn’t matter how you offend Chairman Yuan but I can’t afford to offend him.” He lowered his head, “I really can’t afford to.”

“My dad won’t do anything to you, I will protect you, I will…”

“What do you have to protect me?” GuQingPei looked at him, “You have nothing right now. YuanYang, but I have a lot of things that I’m not wanting to let go.”

YuanYang clasp onto his arm and gritted his teeth, “What you want, I will give it to you in the future. I will definitely give it to you, but you can’t leave me at this moment. You are mine. Not to mention my dad, or anyone else, nobody can separate us.”

GuQingPei lowered his head, “YuanYang, go back home first. Right now… I really just… just want to be alone for a while.”

YuanYang looked at him hesitantly. Finally, he lifted GuQingPei’s chin and kissed him intensely, his voice soft, “GuQingPei, I will not give you to anyone else.”

GuQingPei lowered his head, “Go home.”

YuanYang tightly clenched his fist, turned and walked away.

GuQingPei sat down on his chair and looked at his study room. The scene in front of him seemed to have frozen. There is a lot in front of him, but it seems as though he couldn’t see anything.

A home that is without YuanYang, no matter how warm the heater is turned on, people still felt cold from within their hearts.

When he thought that they would no longer be able to live their harmonious days again, his heart painfully tightened into a ball.

There are many things in the world that are difficult. Giving up on a relationship when one has become deeply and sentimentally vested is as hard as ripping out a person’s internal organs. Because once this person exists in the heart, then he is everywhere…in memories… in sight… in the home, and in all visions of the future.

To completely throw all this away, how much willpower would he need? GuQingPei didn’t even want to think about it.