You! Don’t Press that Button! - Chap 88

“Hah,” I sighed deeply and lowered my face. My heart is somewhat inclined? Really? I unconsciously chewed on my lips as I looked around. A beautifully blooming flower caught my eye. After hesitating, I gently reached out and plucked it with a snap.

It was a classic method, but it seemed like I had to use it for now. I stubbornly pressed my lips together and began to pluck the petals one by one.

“He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not…”

I slowly removed the petals one by one, repeating the same phrases. Soon, the vibrant colors disappeared, leaving only one petal pitifully remaining. I swallowed hard and quietly said, “He loves me not.”

As I looked at the now unsightly flower, I glanced down and noticed the green leaves still attached to the stem. Pretending not to notice, I reached out again and began plucking the leaves one by one, muttering softly. Finally, only one leaf remained. I swallowed hard once more and plucked it with a snap.

“He loves me.”

Ignoring the slight forced nature of it, I softly repeated the result.

“He loves me.”

A cool breeze blew, sending the beautiful fallen petals swirling into the sky. My hair, like tangled threads tickling my forehead, swayed and made my vision dizzy.

I relaxed my hand and covered my face. I felt a heat unlike anything before. The truth I had been pretending not to know, had been avoiding, now filled not only my chest but also my mind. My heart was beating faster than ever before, and my head felt like it was spinning.

Though it was unlikely, I felt as if the sound of my heart was leaking through my parted lips, so I covered my mouth with both palms. Trying to calm my trembling breath, I whispered quietly through the small gaps between my fingers.

“I’ve been in love. Me, with Karhan…”

🐤

To calm myself, I avoided Karhan for several days. Whenever I turned a corner in the hallway, I always sent a servant ahead to check if Karhan was there, and I ate my meals quickly with the door firmly locked. The servant looked at me strangely, but now wasn’t the time to worry about such things. It was far more important not to meet Karhan until my feelings subsided.

It was the first time I had intentionally avoided Karhan for such a long period. On the first day, I felt nervous and a strange anxiety stirred in my heart, but as two days passed, then three, my agitated feelings gradually settled. I felt a little empty, but it didn’t bother me much.

Liking him? That can’t be. I’m someone who will soon return. This must have been because it was the first confession I’d received in 20 years of living, that’s why I was so flustered. Look now. Even when I think of Karhan, my heart doesn’t beat that fast. That day, I must have been so surprised that it was pounding. I smiled lightly, gently shaking the hand I had placed on my chest.

Now that I had calmed down this much, I thought I could meet Karhan. And maybe Karhan had confessed to me out of confusion after I was kidnapped. It was highly likely that he felt empty when someone who was always by his side disappeared.

Excited at the thought of seeing Karhan after a long time, I left my room with light steps. Full of anticipation, I ran down the corridor, and at the moment I turned the corner, I collided with something large and unidentified.

“Aack!”

“Ah!”

Both the other person and I fell backwards, and at the same time, something large collapsed with a rumble. As I squeezed my eyes shut, soft things fell from the sky. Fortunately, it didn’t hurt. I opened one eye slightly and saw laundry scattered everywhere.

“I-I’m so sorry!”

The servant who had been carrying the laundry apologized hurriedly as they got up. I felt bad that the servant was apologizing when I was the one who had been walking quickly without looking around, so I quickly stood up and bowed my head.

“I’m sorry! It was my fault.”

I bent down and quickly gathered the clothes. They have to carry so much alone. It must be hard. With these idle thoughts, I was stuffing the clothes into the basket when suddenly something hard touched my hand.

What’s this? I stopped moving and lifted the clothes to see what looked like a metal bracelet. It seemed a bit old, but the jewel set in the center still sparkled beautifully without fading. It looked similar to the magic stone I had seen when camping with Karhan before.

Entranced by the beautifully shining jewel, I reached out to pick it up, but the servant’s rough hand grabbed it first.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t look where I was going…”

“Ah. No! It was my carelessness.”

Although I said it was fine several times, the servant kept bowing deeply and repeating apologies. Perhaps because this was a world where social status clearly existed, the excessive apology made me feel strange. We had collided at a corner, so it was no one’s fault really.

In the end, the bowing servant didn’t lift their head until I left the spot.

The uneasy feeling soon passed as I arrived at Karhan’s office. Standing in front of the firmly closed door, I slowly exhaled. My heart was pounding, but this was surely because I was seeing him after a long time, not because I liked him.

I smiled lightly out of habit and looked at the servant, who then knocked on the door to announce my visit. Expecting the door to open wide soon, I fidgeted with my hands clasped in front of me and repeatedly raised and lowered my heels. Although the wait in the corridor was clearly a short time, it felt quite long and anxious to me.

When Karhan gave permission, the servant opened the door wide. Although it had been a while since I’d seen the office, the same scenery as before greeted me. Feeling a bit awkward, I carefully stepped in while unnecessarily examining the bookshelf. As I fully entered, the door closed, and Karhan and I were alone in the same space as usual.

An awkward silence hung in the air. After standing still for a moment, making eye contact with Karhan, I moved my head creakily like an old screw.

“Sh-shall I sit in the chair?”

Was that awkward just now? Probably not, right? It must have seemed natural, right? There’s no way he could tell I’m nervous. I secretly clenched my fist and sat on the sofa, leaning back. As I rested my body on the soft surface, the tension that had made me stiff gradually eased.

Karhan, who was usually busy with his work even when I visited his office, was staring at me intently today. And from the chair directly across from me, no less. The thought that Karhan’s confession to me wasn’t just a simple misunderstanding slowly crept up my spine.

His piercing gaze pricked my skin. No, this won’t do. My face will turn red at this rate. If that happens, he’ll find out that I like him. I should just remember that I need to return to my original world. Nodding inwardly, I clenched my hands resting on my knees.

As Karhan and I were engaged in a meaningless staring contest, Claude entered the room carrying a large silver tray in one hand.

What’s that? I looked with round eyes as Claude placed the unidentified object on the table. It was covered, so I couldn’t tell what was inside at all. Seeing me unable to take my eyes off it, Karhan chuckled softly.

“Curious?”

Gasp. No, this won’t do. Karhan shouldn’t be showing interest in me. Reminding myself once again that both Karhan and I need to walk our separate paths, I turned my head abruptly. Exhaling softly, I spoke gruffly.

“N-no. I’m not curious at all.”

I’m dying of curiosity, but I’m not curious at all. As I pulled down the corners of my lips, I heard Karhan’s laughter from across. He reached out and lifted the shiny cover. What appeared was something that looked soft, piled up in a small glass bowl.

I twitched my eyebrows and squinted, examining it intently. This is… no, this is!

“I tried making what you called ‘ice cream’ before. Would you like to try some?”

Good gracious. Ice cream? Now that I look at it, although it’s a bit awkward, the appearance is somewhat similar. It’s white but with a subtle creamy tint… Unconsciously, I swallowed and slightly stuck out my tongue to lick my lips.

Karhan scooped a small amount with the spoon next to it and held it out to my lips.

“I made it for you, so try it.”

I looked at the ice cream on the spoon with trembling eyes. Maybe I’ll just have one bite. He said he made it for me. I did request it too. As the spoon approached, I unconsciously curved my eyes and parted my lips slightly. Then I felt a cold sensation near my face.

Just as I was about to open my mouth wide, unable to contain my anticipation, there was a knock on the closed door. The spoon that had come right up to my nose hesitated and returned to the plate. I smacked my lips in disappointment and shook my head.

I almost fell for that wicked ploy. While Karhan got up from his seat, I quietly let out a sigh of relief. Karhan approached the door and whispered with Claude, then looked at me. Then, with a somewhat apologetic expression, he spoke.

“A guest who was scheduled to visit today has arrived earlier than expected.”

Saying this, he slowly reached out his hand to me. I naturally grasped his approaching hand and stood up.

“If you come back tomorrow, I’ll prepare an even more delicious snack—”

“No! I won’t come tomorrow.”

I shook my head and cried out desperately. Karhan, whose words were cut off midway, opened his mouth awkwardly for a moment before soon showing a faint smile.

“Alright. Come when you’re comfortable.”

I opened my eyes wide at his unexpectedly simple response. Looking at Karhan’s face, his expression was nonchalant. Why? Although it’s not for me to say, I thought he would be at least a little hurt. But he was in his usual calm state.

Having impulsively rushed ahead on my own, I ended up leaving the office while feeling a bit sheepish.

…Why? He said he liked me, didn’t he?

🐤

After that, my conversations with Karhan became both ordinary and extraordinary. Whenever Karhan offered something, I was quick to refuse, startled on my own.

Various accessories and clothes, including flowers, were delivered, and I rejected them all, saying I didn’t want them. Inadvertently continuing a frugal life, I shivered in thin clothes in the chilly garden.

“Ah… I should have accepted that outer garment back then.”

I quietly expressed regret to myself, who had been busy rejecting everything a few days ago. The one fortunate thing was that only cool autumn-like breezes were blowing, and the harsh cold hadn’t arrived yet.